SMS: The Hopper

This blog post is really a request for future blog posts, read below and see if you can help…

It has seemed the clock has been moving at a faster pace and that the calendar pages turn even quicker these days.  I hate to use the overused word “busy” because it seems everyone uses it; so I’ll just say that my days have been filled and I’ve found little margin to do a lot of writing for the blog.  That’s okay, this is not my number one priority.  With that said, I love doing it, but there are times when I know the SMS post is going to require more of me than I can give at that time, thus, THE REQUEST…

Right now I have about seven different Student Ministry Stuff (SMS) Post titles ready to be written; however, most of them are subjects that I know will need a bit of development.  My hope is that you can help me come up with even more subjects for the hopper (those waiting to be written).  Right now I have subjects like: Youth Leaders and Campus Investment; Youth Pastors and How to Spend Your Working Hours; When Saying “Yes” is Saying “No” (and vice versa); The Rookie years of Youth Pastoring (age 20-24); The “Experienced” Years of Youth Pastoring (age 25-28); The Veteran Years  of Youth Pastoring (Age 29+).

What are some other subjects you’d suggest I tackle in the weeks to come and/or which ones of the above would you most like to see me tackle?

Looking forward to finishing up a few major projects so that I can develop some of these SMS thoughts!

Grace,
Brian

“All In”

I remember laughing the first time I saw a live Poker Tournament being televised on ESPN.  I mean, c’mon, seriously, who would watch Poker on TV, isn’t that like watching paint-dry, or worse, viewing a bowling match?

Well, they had me at “the river card.”  I don’t know why, but Texas Hold ‘Em had me hooked as I watched some guy with the last name of “Moneymaker”  win millions of dollars… SIDENOTE:  Chris Moneymaker is his real name.

Well, here we are, seven years after viewing my first ever “Main Event” and having seen many people go “All In” on TV, I am speaking this weekend where the retreat theme is “All In.”  It’s a fantastic theme to build around.  Jesus own words explain the theme well, “if anyone wants to come after me, he must deny himself, pick up his cross and follow me.”  In other words: if we want to be followers of Jesus, we must go all in.”

  • Stephen, he’s a guy who went all in… I love when he, in Acts 7, rebukes the Sanhedrin and says, “you stiff necked people…You always resist the Holy Spirit.”
  • Peter was a gambler with his tongue, he sometimes went all in (cutting off a dudes ear) sometimes for the wrong things; but ultimately, was the one who went all in in speaking up after Jesus ascended.
  • The Ethiopian in Acts 8, all in.
  • Priscilla and Aquila, a couple we read about in the early days of the church… they were all in.

In the post-apostolic age we read of and see many others (and know many more) who are all in for the Gospel.  Are you?

What does it mean to be all in?

This weekend we’re going to explore that with the students from Lake Sawyer Christian.

I think Paul gives us a great hint at part of what it means to be all in; Romans 1:16 says, “I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes.”  I believe it, am growing in boldness to proclaim it and try to live in light of it for His glory and so that others may know Him!

Going all in!

Grace,
Brian

SMS & Three-For-Thursday: Combos Worth Trying

You’ve heard of steak & eggs; Pork chops and applesauce and a myriad of other combos that at first don’t seem like they should go together, but in reality are great fits.

I have some unique food combos I really enjoy, like, Pepperoni Pizza with Tapatio Mexican hot sauce on it.  Or the one that turns many heads, mustard on my french fries (I LOVE it)!

So, it’s Thursday, which means I typically post a “Three-For-Thursday” list.  However, it is also getting to be late in the week and I have yet to post my normally early-in-the-week, “Student Ministry Stuff” (SMS) post.  So here we go, another combo worth trying.

Today the Three-For-Thursday/SMS post is about three combos worth trying in Student Ministry.

  1. Retreats or Missions with other Churches: I’m talking about intentionally doing a camp, retreat or mission trip with other churches in your immediate area (not necessarily talking about a Conference Center pre-programmed mass-camp, though this certainly isn’t a bad thing).  Perhaps out of your network you can get three or four of the Youth Pastors to plan a retreat together.  Obviously there is a lot to consider because of theological i-dotting and t-crossing differences between the churches, but let’s be honest, most students do not find themselves in heated debates over dispensational or covenantal theology (I know some adults who should learn a lot from these students).  The advantages of doing a combo retreat on occasion (notice I am not saying to do this all the time) far outweigh the negatives, especially when you’re hand selecting your partners.  Students who get to fellowship, worship and grow together at a camp, will then see each other on their campuses, in their clubs on their fields and within the community.  I’ve done many-a-mission and camp with my youth pastorate family; it’s been so fun to see the gifts/strengths augment the weaknesses as the body came together in leadership!
  2. The Sacred and Secular! The word “secular” can have such a negative connotation; “oh my, you listen to SECULAR music?”  Hmm, yep.  And guess what, I’m not a satan worshipper.  I realize, the majority of people reading this blog would never take issue with secular music (keeping in mind, that yes, there is bad stuff that should be avoided), however, music is not really the point of this point.  My suggestion really is trying to answer the question of how we can take the Gospel out of the four walls of the church.  First, I believe that YOU need to model the Sacred/Secular combo.  I suggest for you paid youth workers to maintain a secular presence (be on campus, office at coffee shops, coach at a school, get a p/t job in a secular setting).  Next, I’d ask, how can you get your group into a secular setting?  One of my favorite ways I have done this was something we did when I served as an Associate Pastor in Phoenix. We’d rent out Seattle’s Best Coffee for the two hours after their official “close” time on Saturday, essentially keeping them open until 10:0o PM instead of 8:00 PM.  Because it was officially a “private party” we were able to do mini-concerts and our students would pack the place out & bring non-Christian friends.  I arranged for SBC to offer 1/2 price drinks to everyone and then we suggested everyone tip a buck to the baristas (literally in two hours the baristas would often walk out with $50 each).  People from the public would come in seeing that SBC was hopping, our Christian kids would engage them.  Baristas were blessed by great tips and the students would sing their hearts out and testify about their faith in Christ.  If you’re interested in this idea, please contact me, I can tell you how I arranged this with the coffee shop… believe me, this was a HUGE ministry opportunity, where we did see salvation take place!
  3. Mission Trips and Missional Life (What Youthmark calls “Mission51”). Okay, so this could be seen as a cheap plug, but I will unashamedly speak about the idea of Mission51 (living on mission not just on a trip, but the other 51 weeks as well)!  Don’t know why it happened/happens, but the church does a great job of glorifying the mission trip and typically does a poor job of emphasizing “our own Jerusalem.”   Missions has been seen as “over there” instead of “everywhere, including over there.”  Years ago, I decided to combine our mission trip training with our every-week Sunday School.  I know that not every student is going to go on our mission trip, but if I believe the training for the mission trip is important, then it better be something I am doing for everyone in our group, not just the mission team.   This is something at Youthmark that we have made a HUGE improvement for this coming year.  Our new 2011 training package does WAY better in streamlining the the training process to include the Youth Group (and even the parents) in the process, not just the mission team, because, after all, we are all on Mission!  I can’t wait to preview these materials in about a month!

Hope the combos I offered stir up some thoughts for you, one thing I can guarantee, these combos are WAY better than Orange Juice after brushing your teeth!

Grace,
Brian

The Weekend Update

A couple days ago I posted my goals for the three day weekend, because not all got accomplished–and that is okay, since I was aiming to get 50% of them done– I will make this update my post for the day.  A new SMS should be written later today or early tomorrow.

I knew I wouldn’t get everything done, but did have quite the list of stuff I wanted to accomplish… throw in church, some family time, a little yard work and a bit of down time and the tasks did seem to grow larger.  Here were the goals and how I fared.

  • Finish the rough draft of the book,  Anywhere (Mission Prep Workbook for 2011)… NOT FINISHED, great progress, still needs a couple days.
  • De-summer the back yard (pack up kiddie pool, take down shade/shelter, etc)… FINISHED!
  • Finish the new office organizing… FINISHED (this one took way longer than I had hoped, but it feels great to have it done!
  • Clean Gutters… Didn’t even attempt.
  • Watch Husky Game… FINISHED, let’s just hope this was a blip on the radar.
  • Ride bike at least 2 out of the 3 days… FINISHED, rode on both Saturday and Sunday.
  • Closet re-organizing (get rid of clothes I will no longer wear)… Didn’t even attempt.
  • Clean/organize the garage enough that my 4Runner can get re-acquainted with the indoor feeling… Sort of FINISHED?  I did the work, the problem is recycle doesn’t come until next week, so all the boxes that need to get broken down are actually what is preventing the 4Runner from going in.

So, when all is said and done, there were eight tasks listed, the goal was 50%.  I’ll give myself a solid 56% (4.5 out of 8), since the 4Runner is not actually in the garage yet.

You’re welcome, I know you were dying to know how I did.

Grace,
Brian

The 2010 final 100five50 Post

Back in May I invited others to join me in the 100five50 Challenge; I know of about a dozen others who commented, texted, facebooked, emailed me or told me in person that they would join in.  So, here we are, approximately 100 days after the start… how did you do?

I went back and re-read my post; one line that that stood out to me:

“So this year I start at about 220 and the goal this year is to get to and stay at about 200, but even this is just a loose goal, I just want to be in a good condition, regardless of the overall weight.

I really like that quote, not by way of justifying my weight, but because I was able to accomplish that goal!  I feel I am probably in the best condition of my adult life.  Even though I was about 216 on the scale this morning, I am convinced that I simply need to change some of my eating disciplines in order for a little more weight to come off (I’d like to get to about 210), because my exercise discipline is going really well.  I also wonder how much muscle weight I may have put on while losing some fat weight?  I biked very aggressively over the last month (which dramatically increased my appetite as well).

Okay, so here are the final results…

100 Days

Memorial Day Weight (start): 222

Labor Day Weight (finish): 216

Five Days Per Week of Exercise (30 minutes of cardio minimum)

I was able to do that 10 of the 15 weeks (several other weeks had 3 or 4 days, two weeks in July had zero… traveling)

Because I was traveling there were days I could only go on a long walk, but my overall bike riding took me approximately:

June: 118 miles

July: 129 miles (including two weeks at the beginning with zero rides)

August: 190 miles (wow, I really did get aggressive..)

437 total.

50% of my normal carbs

Here is where I did not do great.  I would guess that I cut carbs by about 25% overall… so, I know where I need to become more disciplined.

Ovearall, I feel great.  I look forward to not being overly conscientious about it right now, though it has become so much more my lifestyle and not a “diet.”  Maybe around Christmas I’ll create some other blitz month for anyone who wants to stay accountable to do together.

Thank you 100five5075, you’ve been good to me!

Grace,
Brian

Weekend Goal: 50%

I’ve quite the list of stuff that I’d like to accomplish over the long weekend… so, instead of feeling down if I don’t get them all done, I’m doing to be realistic… if I can get 50% of the following done then a celebratory dance you shall do… deal?

  • Finish the rough draft of the book,  Anywhere (Mission Prep Workbook for 2011)
  • De-summer the back yard (pack up kiddie pool, take down shade/shelter, etc)
  • Finish the new office organizing
  • Clean Gutters
  • Watch Husky Game
  • Ride bike at least 2 out of the 3 days
  • Closet re-organizing (get rid of clothes I will no longer wear)
  • Clean/organize the garage enough that my 4Runner can get re-acquainted with the indoor feeling.

Update to come late Monday night or early Tuesday (after the weekend)…

Grace,

Brian

Three-For-Thursday: Returning Routines

Yesterday marked the beginning of school for my two oldest.  Halle  and Audrey were off to school and our new routine started.  The last couple weeks have been somewhat tough, we’ve sort of felt like a plane on the tarmac, waiting to take off and get to our destination.

We’re up-up and away… The beginning of the school year for Elisabeth means some new freedoms (both girls in school all day) and some new challenges (namely, Will being a tw0-year-old boy who loves to get into EVERYTHING).  For me, the end of the 2010 Youthmark Mission Ventures and some downtime/vacation time in August followed by the quick-turnaround to focus on the next year YMV’s has made me look forward to this new routine.

Today, I look at three returning routines in our life and why they make the “Three-For-Thursday.”

  1. Young Life and the new “Big Monday”: A couple years ago, after I resigned as a Youth Pastor and went full-time with Youthmark I began volunteering with Young Life.  In just a couple weeks we’re launching “Big Monday.”  Our club, followed by hang-time at DQ, followed by Campaigners (small groups) will make for a full Monday (BIG Monday), but it is an exciting time.  I am stoked to be with Non-Christian and Unchurched teens.  High School students are so full-of-life, yet find themselves searching for anything to fill-their-life.  Building relationships, being creative with our programs and digging deeper into the life of Christ will be the purpose for Big Monday.  Let’s go BIG!
  2. Sundays/Church Life: For about 20 months the Aaby family has called “Faith” home.  Our new church in Kent has really been a great place to land after 16 years of being a Youth Pastor. Not being a vocational pastor, and being able to choose the church (rather than being chosen by a church in a sense) was very meaningful to me/us.  We love our church home and I love being there.  Though we were there most Sundays this summer, the sense of routine of heading into the fall seems to excite me.  Will does great in his 2-year-old setting.  The girls love the Children’s ministry, Elisabeth is getting more involved with the Women’s ministry and I find myself drawn to several key relationships at the church.  I believe the 2010/2011 year is going to bring greater clarity as to the places we will serve.  As the church is changing (which I believe a church should always be changing), I find myself getting more and more excited.  I want to see something at our church that cannot be explained by any man or woman–only by the work of a wonderful triune God!
  3. Youth Pastor Networks: I love the people I get to work with.  Sure, Buzz and Kirk (and other volunteers) are great to work with at Youthmark, but I’m talking about my Youth Leader family.  On a weekly basis I meet with many youth leaders.  I have some that are routine (weekly with one network, and monthly with another), but I have many others that I meet with from time to time.  On top of this, there are some that I gather to meet with so that I can share with them the vision of Youthmark and why they may want to join us for a YMV.  As I move into the fall, I’m  very excited about the opportunity to renew these relationships and meet many new leaders who are committed to seeing the Gospel spread through teens!

Let the comfort of returning routines breed new life (and change) in each of us!

Grace,
Brian

SMS: An Open Letter To Parents

Dear Parents of Teens,

I can’t pretend to speak for all Youth Leaders, but having been involved with Student Ministries for nearly two complete decades (16 years of which I was a Youth Pastor),  I think I speak for most when I say our friendship, and our partnership (between parents and youth leaders) ought to be stronger.  After all, we have something in common, we both love your kid!

My hope in writing this “open letter” is that I can lend my voice to what I hope can become a vibrant relationship in your local student ministry setting(s).  I am of the firm belief that the student ministry landscape could change dramatically if parents and leaders prioritized relationship and partnership with one another.  I’m not suggesting you become best friends with your son’s small group leader or that you look to take the Youth Pastor on your family vacation, but I will give you (the parent) some practical suggestions as to how to be proactive in this needed relationship.

Unfortunately many Youth Leaders (paid or volunteer) are intimidated by parents; it may be because so many youth leaders are young and figure they are perceived (deserved or undeserved) as being unwise, full of energy, flakey, exuberant and sometimes a threat to the parent/child relationship.  The reality is, many young youth leaders are unwise, exuberant and the like, and just like your child needs a mentor, so do many most, of us. Even older youth leaders are often intimidated by parents, they don’t want to step on toes, get in the way or be perceived as trying to do something that is intended for the parent/child relationship.  But, that’s our problem (as youth leaders), we need to get over these perceptions and do the work of relating to parents for the sake of the kids!

But, this letter is written to you, parent.  So, if I may, I’d love to give you a few suggestions as to how this relationship may improve or get even stronger (because I do want to recognize, there are MANY great relationships out there too).

  1. Pray for them (and let them know you’re praying for them).  In Matthew 9, Jesus tells His disciples to ask the Lord of the harvest for harvest workers.  Well, these youth leaders are an answer to prayer!  Though they aren’t perfect, they are striving for Godliness and are seeking to influence your child for Christ.  Praise God for them and constantly lift them up in your prayers.  What would it look like for YOU to gather other parents once or twice a year just for the purpose of praying for the Youth Staff (paid and volunteer)?  How encouraging would it be to the youth leader or team to know that they were being covered corporately and as individuals?
  2. Give to them.  A note of encouragement in the mail, on a facebook wall or strategically placed on a youth leaders front door will often propel that leader in ways unimaginable.  Giving may even mean something physical.  Dinner.  A coffee card.  A paid-for date-night (even with babysitting!!!!).  Your small gift may be the exact encouragement he or she needed to get over the hump after a season of discouragement in the ministry. Side Note: Don’t ever underestimate the power of two words “thank” and “you.”  These words are often forgotten and these youth leaders who labored all weekend at the retreat, all week on the mission or all year at small group are worthy of you going out of your way to give them those precious words, “thank you.”
  3. Ask of them. You parent, can be, should be and are the “expert” when it comes to your teen (at least we hope that you’re striving for that deep relationship), however, youth leaders are often pretty darn wise when it comes to knowing teens as a whole.  So, let’s let this tension exist, leaders should become experts in teenagedom and parents can be experts about their teens.  Therefore, we need to learn from one another.  So, ask your son or daughter’s leader about teens, even ask about your own child.  Be mindful that these leaders (young or old) are building trust with your child and need to guard that trust, but I think you’ll find more often than not, they may have insights that will prove very helpful to you understanding teens (and even your own son or daughter) more.  Ultimately in asking of them, you’re relating to them and becoming more of a unified team.

As parents begin to pray for, give to and ask of the current flock of youth leaders, I believe not only with the Lord be glorified, but we’ll see better discipleship take place.  We’ll see lost students (and lost parents) be found as we see the church functioning as Christ instructed.

So parents I end with this… thank you for doing what you do and the efforts you make with your kids.  Your job is often THE MOST thankless job in the world.  I am going to pray for you more faithfully, thank you more frequently and seek your wisdom more often!

Grace,

Brian

A Quick 100five50 Update

Over the last week I was able to ride more aggressively than I have in a long time… but again, increase in the ol’ appetite, so no weight loss, but that’s okay, still feeling better and better…

Six rides totally 60 miles.

Weight: Remains around the 217-219 mark (depending on the time of day I weigh-in).

Still trying to cut the carbs, yet, my efforts get easily thwarted by wedding receptions, church picnics, back to school bbq’s and LOW will power.

One week to go in the 100five50, let’s make it the best week yet!

Grace,
Brian