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Four-Month Blog Sabbatical

Brian Aaby 1 Comment

In March of 1995, after a 17 month experiment with professional baseball, Michael Jordan gave a two-word press release:

“I’m back.”

Well, I’m no Michael Jordan. I didn’t try professional baseball, I’m not re-upping with the Bulls, but I do want to make the same statement:

“I’m back.”

Four months ago (today) I posted my last blog post. I didn’t know then that it would be my last for a long time, but things were crazy busy, I had taken on too much and I began to realize that in some ways I was in survival mode. Something had to give. My blog was quickly one of the things that was given.

After some time I was ready to write again, but instead of immediately blogging I decided to re-focus and repurpose. Over the next few weeks I am repurposing the blog. I’ll begin to explain the process a bit in my next post.

So for now, if there is anyone out there still reading, still subscribed to the RSS or anyone who has clicked on the link to come check out what this dude has been up to, stay tuned:

“I’m back,” and it’s good to be here.

Grace,
Brian

Happenings.

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Thank you for your patience. My little-over one month hiatus from blogging has been a very good thing. It gave me the opportunity to rethink what I want to do with the blog, consider how often I want to post and determine how much time I should put into blogging. So, there are some small changes to be had and some big changes as well.

But before we restart, much has happened over these last 5 weeks, so let’s begin with the happenings:

  • December 12 to January 19 happened.
  • I finished a book (writing… don’t start thinking I read one)!
  • Christmas happened… and it happened to be AWESOME.
  • Speaking at an Oregon winter camp happened.
  • A new year happened.
  • I happened to then speak in Arizona for a few days.
  • Justin Bieber got a tatoo.
  • Elisabeth and I happened to speak at Adelphia Bible School for a week.
  • Halle’s Happy Birthday happened. And Elisabeth’s family happened to be here for said birthday.
  • More. People. Happened. To. Write. One. Word. Sentences.
  • A “Winter Extreme” just happens to be melting right now.
  • I ate a dish filled with Garbanzo beans. That just happened.
  • Oh, January 20th just happened too.

As for what will happen?

I plan to be more focussed this year when blogging. This will probably translate to fewer posts, but with more purpose. I’m not looking to just generate content and post because it’s been awhile, but to post because it’s an overflow of my passions.

I’ll look to give some insights into my faith. Glimpses of my family. Do some utterly stupid posts just for fun and of course share a lot about the stuff that brings in our finances (had to work in another word that started with “f”). I love Jesus, my wife and kids, laughter and working within the student and mission ministry field. So, expect that stuff to dominate the blog!

Blessings on our 2012!

Grace,
Brian

Has Anyone Modeled Evangelism To You?

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I get really excited about the Spring! Though we are five months away from our retreat season, we are busy putting together the framework for our 2012 tour.  The Mission51 Retreats give us the opportunity to train all who attend our Spring Retreat in the area of life-evangelism. We truly believe that mission is not a trip. Though trips are great, I believe that the other 51 weeks of life beyond the mission is where the real work of mission takes place (for both the sending team and the receiving communities).

In the spring of 2010 our theme was “Live and Love Loudly” for our Mission51 retreat. We focused on the first letter from Paul to the church at Thessalonica. It’s a great letter and it gave me some fun ideas. One of those ideas I will give you as a “freebie” to use in your youth group, small group or just for personal thought!

The video below was used to help set that stage for evangelism training. When we hear the word “evangelism” or “share your faith” we see many begin to squirm. Quite simply, people are afraid to share because they fear failure and rejection. But the reality is, their fear and failure stems more from a lack of model than anything else.

Who has modeled witness to you? Who have you learned from when it comes to evangelism?

For those who haven’t had it modeled to them, I invite you to find a mentor. For those who are active, I invite you to teach others.

With a very small budget, a decent camera and some very low-paid (read: “no-paid”) actors and some okay editing equipment we put together this little piece we call “read, daddy.”

Grace,

Brian

15 Minutes Can Save . . .

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I love the commercial with the Gecko reaching into his wallet for his credit card to pay for a meal…

How about the Cavemen? Classic as commercials. Horrible as a TV show.

Regardless of Geico’s crazy ad themes, the tagline that they drive is their call for you to make a call… “15 minutes can save you 15%”.

This morning I took a few minutes to catch up on some youth ministry blogs. I read this one from my friend, Greg Stier. Greg used the State Farm Insurance “Like A Good Neighbor” tagline to call Christians to not just be good neighbors, but to be great neighbors. To do so he suggests that Christians:

  1. Get out of your castle (house)
  2. Pray for your neighbors
  3. Start a neighborhood spiritual discussion group
If you have not read this yet, go read it now. This is not a call just to those involved in student ministries. It’s a call to ALL Christians. I applaud Greg’s humility and response to the Spirit’s conviction in his own life. Here’s a guy with a national platform calling himself and others to engage the lost in the front yard, not just the big stage.
It got me thinking about the number of spiritual conversations I’ve had lately and the correlation with the above-name Geico Insurance company tagline, “15 minutes can save . . .”
Don’t read that as a trite, “15 minutes will save someone.” Though I firmly believe the Holy Spirit can work in that way if He chooses, my play on this commercial tagline is to encourage Christians to see that 15 minutes of investment could open up a myriad of doors into the lives of others and perhaps the front doors to spiritual conversations about God’s saving love.
  • What if you and your kids took 15 minutes to grab your rakes and wheelbarrow when you saw your neighbors attacking their leaves?
  • Could you swing by your neighbor-kids soccer game and cheer with mom and dad for the last 15 minutes of their son or daughters game?
  • As we approach the holidays, how about doubling a few recipes and take 15 minutes to deliver Thanksgiving pies, cookies or cupcakes to your neighbors with a “This Thanksgiving our family is thankful for you” cards?
Of course there are scores of other ideas we can come up with that would only take about 15 minutes. These 15 minutes could go a long way toward opening up conversations where you get to share the amazing story of God’s grace in your life. Three things you can do behind closed doors to be prepared for those 15 minutes beyond your front door.
  1. Consistently Pray for people and opportunities (not just for your neighbors, but anywhere and anyone).
  2. Constantly Practice sharing your story and the gospel, even as a family so when the time comes, you’re ready to give an answer for the hope you have (learn to share the gospel conversationally).
  3. Courageously Participate when God opens the door for spiritual conversation.
15 minutes can save. Let’s be prepared to not just be used for 15 minutes, but to be used by God for our lifetime to bring the message of His love to everyone!
Grace,
Brian

SMS: The Downward Spiral of a Youth Leader (Part 1)

Brian Aaby 2 Comments

“Garrett” arrived to his first Youth Pastor network meeting with the youth pastor look! You know, young-but-confident (cocky?), backpack-in-tow, as much facial hair as his 22 year old body could produce and a tight-fit stocking cap. He was quick to speak and let us know that he knew exactly what he was doing. He had an answer to EVERY question and his energy level led me to believe that he’d already had a second (or fifth) cup of coffee before he arrived at the 10:00 am gathering.

I love Garrett. And our network loved Garrett because we all looked past the Garrett he was trying to be and with/by grace we knew the Garrett he’d become. Most of us had been Garrett.

Like the others in that Youth Pastor Network, Garrett loved the teens at his church. His love for them grew and he was able to see the initial skepticism about him change to a genuine love for one another. As Garrett began to listen to wise counsel he looked to move from a one-man show to a team of 3-4 adult leaders who would faithfully pour into the youth. Garrett was “getting it” as a Youth Pastor and it showed as our conversations deepened at network and other social situations.

But then, after about a year, the downward spiral began…

I see this spiral way too often and there are typically three things that mark this downward trend. I write this to hopefully help the younger generation of Youth Leaders identify these potential game-changers.

These three things were true of Garrett, are they true of you?

1. Garrett Began To Expand His Ministry Role:  Because Garrett’s gifts and talents were obvious to many, he was asked to step into other areas of ministry outside of Youth Ministry. The once-in-a-while worship leading became twice-in-a-while pretty quickly. Many were concerned about what was happening to the high school grads and because Garrett had a heart for these young adults a Monday night Bible Study was formed for the students who were sticking around. Since his influence had grown the Senior Pastor asked him to take part in the board meetings so that Garrrett could represent those voices he was shepherding. The young couples at the church were anxious to get something going so Garrett and his bride took on the leadership role for the “Young Married’s.” Garrett’s twice-a-week evening commitments had become at least four nights a week, if not five (depending on the board meeting nights) or six (college, young married group, etc.).

It felt good to be wanted/needed and Garrett began to think that an expanded role will please the elders and they’d give him the pay raise he deserved (hold back your laughter please… he was young).

2. Discipleship Replaced Evangelism: First let me note that I don’t think that these two should be separated, but quite often in youth ministries (or churches) they are… Okay, back to Garrett. Youth Group Night was the time that students were encouraged to bring their unchurched friends, Garrett put a big emphasis on sharing the gospel at this gathering! Sunday mornings were “growing deeper” times as were the small group times (commonly known as “discipleship”). However, about 18 months into his time at this church he noticed more and more complaints about Wednesday night being “too basic” and “always the same message.” Students began to not show up and numbers began to drop. Parents began to voice their concerns to the board and to the Senior Pastor that students weren’t having as much fun as they used to. Therefore, Garrett changed his messages to being more “discipleship” in nature, most of the core returned.

The numbers improved (which often translates to “job security”), but he was preaching three “growth” level messages a week and there was no influence on lost souls. Evangelism “events” were often just another gathering of the core-students. Garrett’s personal evangelism didn’t exist though either…

3. Garrett Was Asked About A Different Position: Because Garrett had a vibrant personality he was a natural “upfront” guy. In fact, in multiple church group settings (camps/retreats)  he was often the guy asked to lead the game or lead worship. His network was growing and after two and a half years on the job the 24 year-old was asked to apply for a position at an out-of-state church. The raise had still not come in his current situation. His frustration of being out at least four nights a week had gone unnoticed and his perception that his job was being judged just by the number of complaints or non-complaints Garrett felt the freedom to sneak a peak at not just that opening, but ALL openings. The grass sure looked greener EVERYWHERE. Hiding the search from all others (including the network), he grew more and more excited about the other opportunities and found it almost impossible to put his best foot forward here. By the time we knew about the majority of his struggles and his search he had already said “yes” to the move.

Unfortunately Garrett’s story is very common. In many ways it has been my story at times. This is not to say that Garrett was wrong to leave, I’m not looking at placing blame, I hope that I can simply help some Youth Leaders identify some of the patterns that cause discontentedness. So the question arrises, what can be done to counter this?

Tune in tomorrow for part two!

Grace,
Brian

The Tale of Two Stages

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Sunday it was “set” for church. By Wednesday it was rocking for Youthmark’s LIFT event and by Saturday it was decked out for Stephen and Jenny’s Wedding.

Thanks Faith Church!

LIFT was all it was billed to be- concert :: training :: worship

Fun to see friends get hitched!

Grace,

Brian

SMS: An Open Letter to Parents

Brian Aaby 1 Comment

Dear Student Ministry Parents,

Hi! Let me introduce myself, my name is Brian Aaby, I have been involved with Youth Ministry for about 20 years, 16 as a Youth Pastor and now I serve as the President of Student Ministry related organization (Youthmark). I want to write this letter to you, parents of students involved in Youth Ministries across the country, just to give you a quick heads-up.

A few weeks ago I walked in to a very familiar setting, the coffee shop that some of my best friends meet in each week. This group of friends represents 5-8 different churches each week (depending on who is able to attend). I love this youth ministry network, but on this particular day, I grieved for this group!  They had the look.

It was early June, too early for the look, but I saw it nonetheless.

Parents, you know the look, because you often have the look.  Metaphorically (or perhaps for real), your feet are sore from all the running around at your job. Your legs are cramping from lifting your own load and carrying the burdens of your family and friends. Your back is tight from the stress the economy has placed on your budget. Your brain feels fried from the bombardment of questions that need to be answered by anyone and everyone. Your hands are calloused due to the constant cleaning, straightening and fixing of everything in your house. And unfortunately, it’s not just your hands that feel calloused, but your heart too. Sometimes you feel unloved, under appreciated and certainly unnoticed.

Yeah, you know that look. Tired. Weary. Questioning.

Yet, like you, most of these youth pastors in my networks (and around the nation), will keep going, because it is their passion, their calling and their love: Your children! They do it not for the money (’cause rarely is there much), they do it not because they couldn’t make it in other careers (unfortunately, we have too many good Youth Pastors leaving because they no longer can afford to be in youth ministry) and they do it not because they NEED the affirmation (because, as mentioned above, it’s just not always there).  They do it because they love to see LIFE!

Youth Pastors (and I’ll expand it to Youth Leaders, many of whom are you–parents), live in the lifestyle of Youth Ministry because they love to see lives changed. They long to see Jesus change hearts. They live to see your students reach out to others with the gospel of Jesus. They pray, plan and produce, so that your children can learn, love and lead!

Parents, youth pastors need to do much more to include you, inform you and appreciate you, NO DOUBT. But as a former youth pastor, I so appreciated when parents went out of their way to draw me in. Youth ministry was such a balancing act, I wanted to pour into students, develop a volunteer team, look good in the eyes of the elders and THEN try to keep parents happy. It was an endless cycle and one that I had NO CLUE about when I was in my lower to mid 20’s (the age of most youth pastors).

That look in June is dangerous, because the summer season hadn’t even begun. Mission trips, camps (i.e. “time away from family”) VBS, fall planning, filling the pulpit for the vacationing senior pastor, weekly studies & programs and all the impromptu events haven’t even happened yet. It’s a look I expect to see in mid-August, not in June. But it is something YOU CAN HELP! You can help GIVE LIFE so that in turn, youth leaders can do the same. Here are a few quick suggestions:

  • Prayer partnership. How cool would it be to have a couple/family take a month to love on and pray for the Youth Pastor (or other pastors for that matter)? 12 couples committed to taking a month… wow! A weekly phone call, a text check-in and an occasional note just reminding them that you’re praying for him/her.
  • Be the last parent to leave. After the mission trip, retreat or camp, as the parking lot empties, the Youth Pastor always remains to pick up the leftover sleeping bag, suitcases and the lone-sock. Yep, there is always a single sock that somehow makes it way out into the parking lot.  What if you volunteered to stick around and clean out the van and let him/her get home to his/her family?
  • Date Night. We longed for this (still do). A night in which a trusted family volunteered to come to our house and watch our kids (even for an hour or two) so that we (as a couple) could reunite. The 10 days of the mission trip being away from my wife/kids was very hard, but then to try to re-engage in the midst of chaos at home made it feel like the 10 days extended to 30 (she needed a break, I wanted a break, etc.). Your willingness just to give these youth ministry couples even two hours will lead to a healthier marriage and ministry.
  • The Simple “Thank You.”  This is by far the least costly, but often the most-rewarding. A specific thank you from a  parent (and student) is often the Gatorade of the youth ministry marathon. It tastes great and refuels.
There are so many more that I can think of and plan to implement even now as a recipient of a great Children’s Ministry at our church. I want to be aware of the look in every ministry.
Parents, thank you for allowing youth leaders to have influence in the lives of your students. We count it an honor to impact lives  (and be impacted by you and your family as well) and the more healthy we are as youth ministers the better impact we can have. We know it goes both ways and we truly do desire to improve the relationship with parents!
My hope is that this open letter will lead to even one step toward unity in the body (1 Cor. 12). I long to see our youth pastor network feeling refreshed because of the refuge they have not just in each other, but in the parents in their ministries. My prayer is that even one parent will read this and respond with an action. I long to see that look even less! Love well. Others will know us by our love!
Grace,
Brian

Auto Maintenance and Mission Trips!

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Hey everyone! I’m sitting in an auto-shop getting my oil changed, which got me thinking… I need my oil changed every 3000 to 5000 miles, or so they say (I think we ALWAYS push it beyond the 5k). We do this to keep the engine running smoothly, to get the junk out and to get a new filter.

This week, I believe God is going to do some needed changes in many hearts! Not just in the hearts of the lost (though I pray many people come to trust in Christ), but God is going to be doing some major changes in the lives of our team members out this week. Some of our students and staff need this week to get rid of the junk. A week away from bad relationships, temptations and sometimes just the apathy that the “norm” provides.  This week will provide a new-flow of challenges and opportunities that will ultimately equip our teams for Mission51, the 51 weeks after the mission trip back home!

Maybe, just maybe, this week can be about life-change for us, the people back home praying as well. As we pray about life-change for others, I believe God will show Himself in MIGHTY ways to us. We’ll get the maintenance on our hearts that is so needed as well!

If you click here you can see each of our teams who are blogging. Would you pray for one, two or possibly multiple teams this week? Even when the “red-dot” doesn’t show up, read and re-read previous posts and continue to pray for the listed requests.  Here are the teams we have out right now:

Calvary Chapel Silverdale to Petersburg, AK

Cascade Community to Ocean Park, WA

Faith Church to Pincher Creek, Alberta

Faith Church  to Fort MacLeod, Alberta

Grace Church to Shasta, CA

Lake Sawyer Christian to Nicoya and San Jose, Costa Rica

Lake Sawyer Christian to Cascade, ID

Lake Sawyer Christian to Cambridge, ID

In addition, I am aware of at least one team who used Youthmark Curriculum to train students who are out this week as well. Boulevard Park Church is serving in Lincoln, MT.

I’m appreciate your faithfulness to these teams. Your prayers are being heard and answered!

I’m excited about getting into my car, knowing that this small maintenance item goes a long distance. My hope is that my small prayers will go a long distance in the lives of many as well!

Grace,
Brian

Lake Retreat; What a treat!

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The weather was an absolute loss. But that was the only negative about the weekend!

On top of having our largest crowd of the Spring Retreat season, I got to have my family out at Lake Retreat with me! In fact, on Saturday, during the free time I was able to take the kids down the the rock wall where both Halle and Audrey did the full climb and got to “ring the bell”

This year I have received more feedback via FB, email and texts than any other year. The students (and leaders) are saying that this weekend has made a world of difference in his/her life. In fact, one message I just received said, “this training, single handed, has given me the passion to reach my own school for Jesus… Mission51 all the way.” Another leader posted on his wall that he felt “privileged” to be at such a retreat.  What humbling and gratifying statements.

I know that I’ve said this before, but I really feel like we (Youthmark) have hit our stride with this training. It is a great mix of worship, fellowship, teaching and practice! Yes, practice. In order to share our faith “out there” or “over there” I believe we need to practice it “right here” and “right now.”

I look forward to sharing more about the retreat (a couple cool things we do) but will wait until we’re done with our last three training times. Right now, we’d appreciate prayers for the 8 groups headed out to Lake Retreat this coming weekend!

Grace,
Brian

Specific Prayer Partners!

Brian Aaby 1 Comment

Hey Friends!

We have these really cool blogs going on over at youthmark.com.  Just yesterday I shot an email to all the participating youth groups for the 2011 YMV’s. In that email I stated that the biggest mistake that Youth Pastors admit to after a YMV experience is not soliciting prayer early enough or often enough! Even now, only about 1/3 of the teams are blogging, let’s pray them onto here!

I don’t want to make that same mistake of not soliciting prayer!

This blog post is a unique one, it is a call for prayer (right now) but beyond that a call for prayer-partnership for those who would like to carry us through any of the areas listed below. If you want to “partner” please comment on this post. I will then be able to email you anything specifically because email addresses can be seen by me for anyone who comments.

Here are the things I am looking for prayer partners:

  1. San Diego area Spring Retreat (April 15/16)
  2. Denver area Spring Retreat (April 29/30)
  3. Seattle area Spring Retreat #1 (May 6/7)
  4. Seattle area Spring Retreat #2 (May 13/14)
  5. Portland area Spring Retreat (May 20/21)
  6. Prayer partners for Joe Poppino (worship leader)
  7. Prayer partners for The Admission (the band launching out of these retreats and co-leading with Joe)
  8. Prayer partners for the 40 or so Youth Groups training through the spring for Mission51 (and a mission trip this summer)
  9. Prayer partners for me specifically and the teaching done at these retreats
  10. Prayer partner for my family specifically and the great times I have with them before and between each of the training times!

Would love to see all 10 of these areas “partnered” and perhaps even more than one parter on each!  Any takers?

Grace,
Brian