13 Things To Consider for 2013

December 4, 2012December 4, 2012Brian Aaby 1 Comment

I’m not a new year’s resolution type-a-guy. I’m not against them, to be honest, I just put off thinking about them until December 31 and by then I’d just be making a resolution on a whim.

Instead of a resolution, I created 13 considerations to think about between now and the New Year. Perhaps a few of things will become more than areas I just consider, but truly become things I commit to.

I invite you to the journey… make some assessments and see if any of these considerations for 2013 are ones you want to embrace.

Who is a person I did not spend much (if any) time with in 2012 that I’d like to reconnect with in 2013?
What are some ways I’d like to cut back on online social networking and step forward in-person socializing?
What are some (new) ways I can serve, encourage, pray for and bless my wife?
What is a possession I will give away (or sell) in 2013 in order to bless someone else?
What is one specific and meaningful date I can plan for each one of my kids?
Knowing we are one year closer to Jesus’ return, who are three people that I’d like pray for, care for and (hopefully see opportunity) to share the gospel with?
What is something I want to do this year that most people would be surprised by?
What is a segment or book of the Bible I don’t know as well as I’d like that I will take steps to know more?
What restaurant have I not been to that I will go to in 2013?
What are three areas of my life that I currently see as areas in need of strengthening?
Who are three people in my life that I see as “strong or experienced” in the above mentioned areas that I can have a coffee/meal with for a one-time (or more) mentoring time?
What book (among the scores that have been suggested) have I not read yet that I will FINALLY read?
Who is one person (outside of my family) that I will specifically make it my goal to bless and encourage for the entire 2013 year?

Any other questions you’d like to share that could cause us all to think? Which of the above list sparked some deep thoughts for you?

Grace,

Brian

The Most Important Poll You’ll Ever Take

November 22, 2012November 22, 2012Brian Aaby 2 Comments

Yes, it was worth it to interrupt your holiday weekend to come to this all-too-important Blog-Poll.

Those lovely election phone calls and polls you took were semi-imporant… but they’re no match for this one!

This is one to be prepared for and perhaps even prayed about. Be careful you’re not drugged out on tryptophan when attempting this doozy of a poll.

Yep, it’s time for the Impossible Thanksgiving Day Poll.

WARNING: Much time and thought has gone into the preparation of said poll. Think through your answer and be ready to give an account for your answer. The way this economy, global warming, traffic delays and zoo overcrowding are looking, this hypothetical may soon very well be our reality.

Don’t hesitate to comment below and share why you chose to omit such an important aspect of someone else’s Thanksgiving Day tradition!

Grace,
Brian

What Is Your Mission…Trip?

November 20, 2012November 20, 2012Brian Aaby 1 Comment

Are most mission trips actual mission trips or are they service trips, road trips or simply tourism-plus trips?

Is it word-confusion? Maybe it’s just a matter of semantics?

Perhaps it’s a “po-tay-toe or po-tah-toe” deal?

Mission is certainly not a faith-specific word, however, I do believe the original mission Jesus called the first-century believers to was certainly a mission of faith-making!

Plain and simple: I believe that a mission trip should, primarily, be for the purpose of disciple-making.

Before I am dismissed as a Bible-thumping, evangelism-freak, please understand that I firmly believe that we must show the character qualities of Jesus as we share the words of Jesus (especially as they relate to eternal life). A mission trip should have the end-game or ultimate goal of more people trusting Jesus for salvation.

This does not mean that every trip will be evangelistic in nature, however, I do believe a bridge to the great commission should be able to be made, explained and trained! Unfortunately, I get the sense that very few mission trip participants are making the connection (to the eternal) or receiving training.

Youthmark distributed Pray21 books to all participants at the National Youth Workers Convention (NYWC) and did a giveaway of an iPad mini at the Verge booth. In the few hours I spent at Verge I asked any/all who came by to register for the iPad a few missions oriented questions. Youth Leaders were very quick to give the answer to the “where do you go?” and “what they did” but only a couple were able to answer “how did you prepare the students?” I see this as a missed opportunity!

Service based Mission Trips are not my enemy, I’ve done them, enjoyed them and have seen great outcomes. But I believe they become truly missional when we make the tie to the evangelism/discipleship that will take place because of our service. For instance, we took a week to prepare a camp (physically) for a summer of hosting camps. We painted cabins, deep cleaned bathrooms, raked grass clippings and prayed over nearly every foot of the camp knowing that we were preparing the harvest field. In our prep and debrief of the daily duties we were able to motivate our group because of the hope of the eternal life-change that would take place on those grounds. Our service-sacrifice freed up others for the relational-investment they would make in the lives of students all summer. Even though we knew we were not likely going to have evangelism opportunities, we trained students in evangelism so they could relate to and pray for those who would have the opportunity at that camp. But our evangelism training leading into the trip had much more to do with Mission51- the 51 weeks of life outside the one-week trip! Our primary mission is not the trip, it’s our own campus, club, community and church!

Where is your mission… trip? Are you failing to connect the social justice acts you do with the eternal justification Jesus makes available for us?

Continue to do great things for Jesus, but make the connection to (and tell of) the great things He said as well! As recipients of His great grace, let’s look to share that message with all!

Grace,

Brian

P.S. In perusing the mission trips available at NYWC I was pleasantly surprised that a few were focused on more that just the trip and had a strong evangelism connection. I’d invite you to check out Verge and Youth Missions International as two of my favorites!

Five Youth Pastor What Ifs

November 14, 2012November 14, 2012Brian Aaby 1 Comment

I was a youth pastor for 16 years and for the past four years I’ve continued to work with hundreds of youth pastors through Youthmark and networking. All told, I’m two decades into this youth ministry adventure. My outlook on the student ministry culture certainly took on different perspectives during these years. From the rookie years to the “seasoned veteran” years (which, in youth ministry, takes place around your late 20’s), I have consistently looked back and wondered, “what if?”

I thought I’d jot a few of these “what ifs” down, perhaps just to encourage others. Maybe I’ll come back to some more “what ifs” later, but here are five that stand out to me right now.

1. What if I would have set a better example of peer-to-peer evangelism instead of using pastor-to-youth as my evangelism excuse? [I likely would have discovered that students have the same insecurities and fears I had and I would have begun engaging in and then training others for real-life, relational (with words) evangelism earlier].

2. What if I would have known at an earlier stage that “youth ministry” is actually student, parent, family, peer and church ministry? [I certainly would have had better volunteerism, more parent support and I likely would have felt more respected by the adults in the church rather than alienating others with the “I must prove myself to them” attitude I think I adopted].

3. What if I would have known that putting in more hours, working more days and trying to please as many as possible would NOT impress anyone other than myself? [I would have likely had a better relationship with those in authority over me instead of secretly wishing that they all would notice the hours, days and efforts so that I’d get a raise].

4. What if I would have fallen in love with coffee earlier in my youth pastorate? [I’d likely be dead from caffeine overdose… or more people would know Jesus, as the coffee shop has become one of my primary evangelism outlets]

5. What if I recruited adults to pray with our students instead of just praying for our students? [Disclaimer: I had many adults involved with our teens… but not nearly enough! This honestly is my #1 “what if?” And here is my answer: I believe that we’d see the national statistics of up to 85% of students leaving the church flipped. I believe that we’d see students and adults begin to understand the truth of 1 Corinthians 12–we are one body, many parts and all the parts are needed and I believe we’d see MANY more adults not intimidated by the teen population and vice-versa. I believe that our Sunday morning experience would look and feel way more familial and way more welcoming!]

Honestly, most of this ties into that last one. I wish I would have had someone investing in me at a deeper level. What if someone was praying with me and not just for me? I wish something like Pray21 would have been around 15, even 10 years ago. At the risk of touting product over blog content, I want to urge folks to check this thing out. Team students up with caring adults (even get the mentor for pay the $10 or so for both books) and get this praying with youth thing started!

What if?

Grace,
Brian

An Open Letter to the Departing Youth Pastor

November 13, 2012November 15, 2012Brian Aaby 18 Comments

[Note: It is important for the readers to know that this “open letter” is not to anyone specific. I do not know of someone preparing to leave or in the middle of this difficult process. I simply am speaking from 20 years of experience (and even my own success and/or failure in this area) and from the number of opportunities God has now given me to consult with churches who are in transition between youth pastors.]

Departing Youth Pastor,

When you decide to leave, please do us a favor and leave well.

I totally understand that you’re leaving for any one (or combination) of a myriad of reasons. But whether you’re leaving for something bigger or better, or leaving because you’re bitter, please be aware of the wake of your departure and the damage it may cause.

Yes, I completely understand the temptation to justify your position as to why you are leaving or why you were asked to leave, but please do everyone a favor and protect the bride (the church)–even if this specific church or a few select people did some things or will do some things wrong. I get it, you want others to feel what you have felt, you want all to know how hard it was to make this decision (or to have had it made for you) and you desperately want to hear, “It just won’t be the same without you.” But I simply want to encourage you to do the hard thing and take the high road. It is the better way and you will not regret it.

Whether you’re leaving by choice or have been asked to leave, others in your care will ask “Why?” Of course, you or others have many reasons why this move is taking place. But just because there are many reasons doesn’t mean that everyone is entitled to know them. You (and others) can protect that information. Most of us are on a “need to know” basis and we don’t need to know.

Any departure is tough, you likely love the masses, and probably dislike a few. Those few may be under your skin. Don’t let that outnumbered bunch mute the amazing chorus of your many friends, and the celebration of many victories God granted in your ministry. You loved the ministry, the students, your teammates and the families. Continue to love these people well by leaving well; bless them with words of encouragement rather than looking to fuel your pride. Flee the youthful lust of self-satisfaction. It’s too easy to let Satan kill, steal and destroy the precious memories made and victories won.

Your flesh will literally want to hear things like:

“You left some big shoes to fill”

“What will I do without you?”

and the worst one, “I heard they are leaving the church because of this too.”

Oh how I cringe at that last one. But in not leaving well once, I can admit that I wanted to hear those words. I wanted for others to see it my way, even though I knew that was wrong. I wanted others to leave with me. How immature is that?

There is much more to say in this letter… perhaps I’ll write more later, but for now, please know that I understand that it is hard and you likely have been and will be sinned against at some point in this process, but I can only urge you to do what is best in the long run. Bless others on your way out with words that protect the bride, that bless the ongoing ministry and pray for the transition of the new ministry leader. You will not ever regret doing these things.

Remember, these are our eternal teammates and and our war is not to be against one another, but rather against the enemy who is looking to divide us. Look to be a good teammate!

Grace,
Brian