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Three-For-Thursday: BIG Announcements

Brian Aaby 1 Comment

Some things have been in the works for a number of months that I have not been at liberty to discuss publicly on the blog… well, now I can!  Though I have posted little things here and there through Facebook, I can finally let the cat out of the bag (someone want to give me a history report on that phrase?) and give you my “Three-For-Thursday” of three big announcements for Youthmark!

Before I get to the three-for-thursday, let me start by saying if you are a Youth Pastor/Director or a volunteer in Youth Ministry, we’d love to have you join us this year in training your students for Mission51!  We believe in and want to provide wonderful one week mission experiences, but we emphasize the other 51 weeks of life that mission needs to take place as well.  Some groups join us for a full Youthmark Mission Venture, whereas others already have a mission trip they are doing, but join us for the training process through our Mission51 materials (including curriculum, spring retreat and foll0w-through materials).  Perhaps this is something you should do as well?

Okay, I needed to start there to give a little background, then on top of that we realize many of our churches will be joining us in Alaska, Hawaii, Canada or in a small town in the continental U.S.  However, we realize that mission is not just here… it is “there” as well.  It truly is Anywhere and Anytime.  Therefore, I give you our BIG announcements…

  1. Costa Rica! We are so excited to dip our feet deep into the International waters in offering trips to Costa Rica!  One major element and reason for Costa Rica is that as an organization we want to always emphasize Mission51 (everything we do “there” should be done “here”).  Quite simply, we want our participants sharing the Gospel and Serving.  Well as we live out the great commission and make disciples in the uttermost areas, we will be able to do this without a major language barrier.  English is taught through ninth grade in Costa Rica.  Picture it, we’ll have students in C.R. hoping to practice their english, while we have our students hungry to share the greatest news ever (JESUS) with our native tongue!  While in C.R. our teams will be helping an about-to-launch Church called “The Bridge.” We’ll serve the local community in San Jose, but also reach out to the poor in the rural areas, even out as far as the beautiful coast!
  2. Mexico! This last year we ran a test-market of about 220 down to Mexico through a local denomination.  Mission51 training and a partnership with Mexico Caravan Ministries proved to be a wonderful tag-team (not to mention the great youth and youth leaders from ConvergeNW).  So, just a week or so ago I went down to Mexico and met with the leadership of Mexico Caravan Ministries and we formed an alliance.  I’m very excited for our teams to be trained by Youthmark, but then have the expertise of MCM on the ground with them as they build three homes for three needy families, have a unique customized team experience and then do a final one-day work project as a team.  This is going to be awesome!
  3. Spring Trips! We’ve had a number of requests over the last few years for spring-break mission options.  With our international options now available, we’re able to offer both Mexico and Costa Rica as Spring Break options!  So now we’ll be able to offer international trips in both the Spring and Summer and then ALL of our trips during the summer!

I am so excited about the future of Youthmark.  I truly LOVE my job/calling.  Just today, while talking with my local network on the south-east side, I found myself in awe of the work of the Lord as I heard Youth Leaders testifying about what God is doing in raising up young people with a passion for the lost.  I really hope that no-matter where groups go on a mission trip, that they emphasize the 51 weeks outside of the mission!  Let’s be on mission all the time!

I hope we see many Youth Pastors come and check out this Mission51 stuff and hear about all our Youthmark Mission Venture options (not just Mexico and Costa Rica) at one of our FREE lunches.  Register for a lunch by clicking here.

Now… let’s live out Mission51!

Grace,
Brian

P.S. If we don’t have a lunch near you, this shouldn’t stop you from inquiring about a YMV or Mission51 materials!  In fact, it may be time to have a lunch near you, we just need people on the ground pushing it with us!  Let’s talk!

SMS: Authority Relationships

Brian Aaby 2 Comments

Seems people are once again asking, “how come Youth Pastors don’t stick around very long?”  Depending on which expert you ask, the national average for a Youth Pastor tenure at a church is anywhere from seven months to four years.  In my own research/guesstimations I’d put the “average” at about 3 years.  Yes, there are those who are only at a church for six months, but there are many who stick for 8-10 (or even more) years.

I’m not so interested in knowing the exact “average,” I’m more concerned with the initial question slightly re-phrased, “why do Youth Pastors leave?” Well, as a person who did leave, I had a variety of contributing factors for leaving, as most do.  However, the most common issue I find among the departed is some sort of issue they had/felt/ignored with someone in authority.  Quite often that authority is/was the Senior Pastor.

So today, readers of the SMS blog series, I’d like to tackle the issue of the Senior Pastor and Youth Pastor relationship.  Namely, I’d like to give a little bit of advice to the Youth Pastor on how he/she may help this relationship and perhaps lead to longevity in the Youth Pastorate.  After all, ultimately it is the kids who are getting hurt the most with the turnover rate.  With this hurt, it leads to questions… leaving the students, parents and others with one person to blame–the Youth Pastor for leaving. Which then leads the ex-Youth Pastor with a tough choice… “do I try to leave on the high road even though I am being pelted by this bus I’ve been thrown under or do I ‘expose the truth?'” First piece of advice: TAKE THE HIGH ROAD (shut your mouth, smile a lot and bless the people you’re close to on your way out)! The bride of Christ (the Church) and her reputation is worth much more than the few people you are trying to get to think better of you.

Okay, now that that rant is over, how do you, Youth Leader, attempt to build or improve the relationship with the authority in your life?  Here are a couple ways I’d suggest (NOTE: for the sake of writing, I am using the generic “him” for the  authority role)…

  1. Have His Back. Don’t even need to get into the Bible-lessons we could all preach about gossip and slander, but you should be the first to not entertain gossip about your Senior Pastor.  Believer you-me, you’ll have the opportunity to hear it, but please do run from it, you’ll be blessed because you did.  Know this–you will not agree with everything he does, but this does not mean that you have license to share that with others or to entertain those conversations with others.  If/when those conversations are brought up (when slander is being hurled or  when gossip being disguised as a “prayer request” comes knocking at your door) be quick to show and share of your support of the authority figure.  Take the complaining one with you to the pastor and begin with the posture of support for your Pastor.*  Again, though you may not agree with everything philosophically, theologically or even methodologically, you can still be united in purpose and protection of one another.  You make the first move and be his biggest support outside of his family!  *Note, when a serious accusation is being made or when you know of a specific sin area in the life of the Pastor, please do follow Scripture in the Biblical manor of confrontation (Matthew 18, 1 Tim. 5:19, Titus 2, etc.)
  2. Bless Him the Way You Would Like To Be Blessed! He probably makes more money than you, he probably has a bigger expense account and he probably already receives more “thank you” notes than you.  So what?!?  You love it when someone takes you out to lunch, you are appreciative of the note of encouragement and you may very well love it when words of affirmation are spoken of you… The problem, these don’t happen all that often.  Having been around a lot of Youth Pastors and Pastors alike, I know that both are typically under appreciated (I do celebrate that there are some churches that truly get it and do love and appreciate their leadership well).  Bottom line, look to bless the way that you’d like to be blessed.  Look to do this with no-gain in mind, other than the blessing of being a blessing.  This will go miles (or Kilometers for my friends all over the world) in your relationship.
  3. Stay on His Radar. Because many Youth Pastors are not all that administrative, this could take a little extra effort, but do your best to keep your life in front of him.  In other words, communicate well.  What I typically did (not just for the Pastor, but for the office staff as well) was shoot off my rough/estimated weekly calendar each Monday.  This was something they didn’t need to live by, but if they needed to reference it later, it was there.  If the Pastor seems to think you’re communicating too much, he’ll let you know, otherwise, just continue to shoot him a copy of your email to your staff (include him as a bcc), include him in occasional youth ministry informational meetings and invite him to key events–not because you want him to do anything, just so he knows he’s welcome and wanted.  It goes a long way for the youth as well to know that the two of you are close, trust each other and want each other involved in one-another’s ministries.

Too often there is a disconnect between Youth Pastor and Pastor.  My hope is that Youth Pastors can be proactive in this relationship and really work on the small things like great communication, occasional blessings and protection from the nay-sayers.

Soon I’ll reverse this and perhaps take a crack at writing a blog “How to have a good relationship with your Youth Pastor”… Then you make sure someone, besides you, of course, gets the Senior Pastor to read it!  Stay tuned!

Grace,

Brian

CONTEST: (W.A.I.T.) Super-something?

Brian Aaby 9 Comments

In honor of grabbing a coffee on Tuesday morning with Mark Oestreicher (aka “Marko”), I have decided to post a contest over the weekend.  Marko had a blog when he was the President of Youth Specialties entitled, “YSMarko.com.”  Since leaving Youth Specialties he has changed his blog to WhyIsMarko.com.  Anyway, his photo in need of a caption contest is where I stole got the idea to do my What Am I Thinking (W.A.I.T.) contest.

So, think of what these folks may be thinking.  Post your comments and see if you make it into the running.  I’ll post a winner after the weekend.

If you’re comment doesn’t appear right away, no worries, I’ll approve it the next time on sign-on.

The winner gets a Youthmark t-shirt.

Let’s see what you think of this one…

Grace,

Brian

**************** IN THE RUNNING ****************

Spiderman and Mary Jane, getting ready for the 30-year high school reunion. ~ Carlos H

“Does the costume make your butt look big? Ummmm, no.” ~the wifey

“You traded your comic book collection for THAT?”  ~ AJS

“Wonder twin powers: activate! Form of . . . . our parents??” ~ the wifey

So I’m a bit out of shape… Even superheroes have to take furlough days now. ~Brad

‘C’mon, honey. You’d look GREAT in that Wonder Woman outfit I saw yesterday.’ ~uknowho

*****************The Winner*******************

Congrats to “the wifey!” From the second I read this, I had a feeling it would land #1.  Great stuff, what a witty individual she must be.  Go grab your t-shirt from the stash!

“Wonder twin powers: activate! Form of . . . . our parents??” ~ the wifey

SMS: “Student Leader” Dangerous Title (pt. 2)

Brian Aaby 1 Comment

If you didn’t catch the “Student Leader” A Dangerous Title from last week, you will want to read this first.

I am not sure why the title “Leader” is as glorified as it is.  This last week I attended the National Youth Workers Convention in San Diego.  As I walked through the exhibit area of the convention I was bombarded with signage advertising “Leadership.”  Is it truly our goal to have student become “leaders?”  Perhaps it is just semantics, but my primary goal as a Youth Pastor was to see student develop and mature in their relationship with Christ.  Sometimes this brought about some great “leadership” skills and others became “leaders” in areas that few would ever notice.

Starting with the premise that the title “Student Leader” isn’t necessary, but Student Leadership is a given (meaning: it naturally happens, regardless of title), I would like to continue discussing this subject by providing some specific suggestions for those of you in Youth Ministry who are looking for practical ways to give students ownership within the ministry of the church.

As you mentally peruse your student ministry roster, as you envision those beautiful faces walking through the doors of your youth group, what are your goals for those students?  Is it that they become “great leaders?”  That wasn’t my goal.  I actually envisioned them becoming greater followers.  Putting pressure on them to “perform” is exactly what most everyone else is doing in their life.

  • Get better grades
  • Make varsity
  • Score more points
  • Get more girls/guys
  • Strive to get a raise
  • etc.

I don’t think we need to add “become a student leader” to that fold…  However, if you ask underclassmen what they for in their time in your group, don’t be surprised if they say, “become a leader.”  This can happen regardless of whether you have a Student Leadership Team or not.

However, “team” is a concept I believe we can look to develop.  I do believe there are ways you can still accomplish the goals you may have for a Student Leadership team, but do so without the undo pressure of trying to become a title.  Here are a few suggestions.

  1. Utilize Seniors every-year.  Because of age and stage give the seniors the “untitled” leadership role each year.  I did this by creating the “Senior Thing.”  This  was a retreat I did each August with my senior-to-be.  At this retreat we bonded as a team (through initiative games and discussions, prayer and encouragement, etc.).  I would start by saying, “it’s your senior year, the underclassmen look at you as leaders, the question is, how are you going to lead?”  They came to the realizations that they are leaders by default (because of age), furthermore, they began to understand that leadership can lead down a number of different paths.  Perhaps instead of a title of “Student Leader” you can equip and empower your upperclassmen every year by utilizing them to dream, scheme and pray with you, then utilize them within the student ministry according to their gifts.  This dramatically changed the “senior fall-out” I had experienced the first few years of ministry, seniors understood the role they could play in the future generation by serving the youth group rather than feeling like youth group was still for them.
  2. Create Multiple Teams.  As students develop they begin to discover their gifts and skills.  Giving students natural outlets to utilize these talents will benefit the student and the youth group.  The obvious teams may come to mind: worship, service (community and church) drama and even programming (camps, upfronts, etc.).  But what about the not-so-obvious? Like assimilation/follow-up to newcomers, teaching, prayer, encouragement, missions, writing, etc.  Keep in mind that students typically don’t need “more” on their plates, however, creating opportunities where students can discover and develop gifts and talents is essential to their spiritual growth.
  3. Situational Leadership.  Instead of having “Student Leadership” as a full-time club/team, what if you gave students the opportunity to lead for a season?  Perhaps you rotate by class or small group but give different groups the opportunity to lead a youth group night, an outreach event or even a retreat?  In these scenarios they will see it as a special occasion and not something the have “arrived at.”  However, you’ll see students rise to the occasion and begin to understand that all aspects of the body are needed.  Some will become administrative, others will look to be in the “lead” role upfront whereas others will strive to be behind the scenes and lead that way.

In all of these suggestions and many others you can think of (and please comment), I believe we (as Youth Leaders) need to shepherd, affirm, encourage (and correct when necessary) and look to support students in becoming a more mature follower of Christ.

It’s such an affirmation to be called a “leader” in the eyes of the world and is typically a slam to have someone say, “you’re such a follower,” however, this is exactly what we’re called to be.  The question, are we, as Youth Leaders, modeling true follower-ship?

Grace,

Brian

(SMS and) Three-For-Thursday: Evangelism Isn’t Optional

Brian Aaby 2 Comments

I recently ran into my good friends from Dare 2 Share; they were preparing to teach “Unleashing THE Cause” to a group of Youth Leaders who had gathered for this specific training.  In our brief chit-chat, while attendees began to populate the seats, we were able to discuss one of the biggest issues organizations like D2S and Youthmark face–Evangelism is just not a popular subject, in fact, one may say it is a very unpopular concept.  I honestly had someone write to me recently speaking about Youthmark Mission Venture training materials, the comment “this stuff is just too evangelistic.”  Thank you.

Picture this…

  • The Worship concert will draw a huge crowd, even in a bad economy.
  • The Class on “Manorexia” or the one on “Why He likes He” will both be packed.
  • The Discussion group gathered for a conversation about Water will be buzzing.
  • Evangelism… wait… was that a cricket I heard?

I have absolutely NO problem with the subjects listed above. In fact, if at a conference, I would be very interested in attending each of these.  I believe in worship, educating myself in issues of counseling and sexuality and certainly believe we had better look for ways to reach the needs of the worlds hungry, poor and orphaned.

Knowing that I certainly have more (Christian) adults reading my blog than I do high school (or younger) students, I will start by saying THIS BLOG POST IS FOR YOU!

Specifically, to the Christian… evangelism may not be your gift, however, it is your calling (Acts 1:8, Matthew 28:19-20, 2 Timothy 4:5, Mark 6:7, 12, etc.).

I have the privilege of working with youth and training them for what we call “Mission51” –that is, training for the 51 weeks of life outside the mission.  Yes, Youthmark provides top-notch mission ventures, but our long-term sustainability as a ministry and our life-blood is that each participant be committed to living out and sharing about Jesus for EVERY week of his or her life!

I believe that teens should be the best evangelists we have.  Wait? Doesn’t that contradict what I said above?  Didn’t I say this blog was for adults?

Let me repeat, I do believe teens should be the best evangelists we have in America.

  • They say, 80% of Christians in the U.S. trusted in Jesus at the age of 18 or younger.
  • It is also proven that nationals reach nationals far more effectively than a person from a different culture.

Therefore, I surmise, American teens are our best hope of reaching the lost in America.

Instead of us putting this on them (teens) and expecting them to do it, let’s look at three reasons they aren’t doing it.

  1. They fear they don’t have the right words to say (I wouldn’t know what to say if someone asked me about salvation).
  2. They fear rejection (I don’t want this person to hate or reject me)
  3. They have never had it modeled (why should I do it, you’re not)

Evangelism… I must admit, I’m not a big fan of the word itself.  However, I am HUGE fan of the scriptural mandate and the author of said mandate.  The reason I am not a fan is because so many have soiled the name, “evangelized” with the wrong message (namely, works righteousness) and de-graced the beautiful Gospel of Jesus.

However, these above three reasons for non-evangelism remain, and today’s “Three-For-Thursday” give the three ways YOU (Christian Adult) can help a teen become a better evangelist.

  1. Find someone YOUR AGE and share the Good News. What if we, those of us aged 19-99 (yep, I think you’re exempt at 100… joking of course), took the call from Jesus seriously and we engaged in evangelism at a peer level? We need to be in the business of peer-to-peer evangelism.  You’ll probably discover the three reasons teens aren’t doing it are the very reason you have chosen not to obey as well.
  2. Discover the best way for you to share your faith.  In order to discover something of this nature, you’ll find that you actually have to try it more than once.  Some really like the Four Spiritual Laws.  Others are really good at sharing the Romans Road; I know a number of people who like Dare 2 Share’s G.O.S.P.E.L. acrostic.  Me?  I’m developing a methodology for Youthmark, however, I will say that I firmly believe in a relational evangelism model that includes me sharing not just my story, but God’s story as well.  To be honest, I think ANY of the above (and many others) are great tools, but the key– you need to figure out how to relationally engage (and love) people and look for entry points into their life so that you can share the greatest news ever–Jesus dying on the cross and rising again to provide THE way of salvation for those who place their trust in Him.  With repetition you will discover the way you are most comfortable and confident in sharing your faith.
  3. Make evangelism be only one part of the real call… DISCIPLESHIP.  We are not called to just “evangelize” all nations, we are called to “make disciples.”  This simply means that we are to spiritually nurture others to maturity in Christ.  If a person doesn’t know Jesus, we must first evangelize in order to nurture.  So, as you work on number one and two above, understand that you are called not to have great words to say as an evangelist, but to be a person of discipleship.  Thank the Lord for the church, we are not alone in discipleship, we get to share in this journey… however, you, as an individual are called to do the work of an evangelist!

Notice that none of the above even deal with direct adult-to-teen training.  I am just more convinced today that the real issue for why students are not doing evangelism is that they have not had it modeled (reason #3 listed above as to why they aren’t sharing).

Adults, as we discover the words to say, as we begin to understand that the rejection we face is actually a person rejecting Christ (not us), we will then be able to have voice with a teen.  We will be able to talk about our “success” stories in evangelism… by the way, success in evangelism is just about being faithful with sharing, the Holy Spirit gets to do the work of saving!

Let’s be successful so that our best evangelists will experience great success in the future!

Grace,

Brian

Seriously? Umm… hmmm…

Brian Aaby Leave a comment

My wife and I just finished a wonderful three-day, two night date to Victoria, BC.

We were gifted this wonderful getaway a couple years ago, but were not able to get the stars to align for the trip until right now… it was wonderful.

I love Canada, eh?  However, I really did have to say “eh” when we walked through our hotel lobby and came upon a rather loud crowd all gathered for a convention.  Anyone want to take a crack at what this is all about?

Are you a Banner User?

Back to the good ol’ US of A and time to prepare for the National Youth Workers Convention, which I think promises to be a bit different than the above conference… I hope, eh?

Grace,
Brian

SMS: “Student Leader” a Dangerous Title (pt. 1)

Brian Aaby 7 Comments

I was at the mid-season of my youth-pastorate career, I had just arrived at my new church; my first Sunday was going to begin my assessment of the youth ministry.  The volunteer team was to lead all the normally scheduled events so that the new Associate Pastor could see what he was inheriting.  Conventional wisdom advises assessing a new ministry for a few weeks, not making changes for several months and getting your entire team on board so that eventual changes are owned by everyone.

So here I was, my first Sunday at the new church…

Staff prayer… check.

Sunday School… check.

“Student Leader” Lunch… chuck!

Not a typo… I wanted to chuck that baby out the window right away.

Let me start by saying I am not a fan of the title “Student Leader.” I had come in to this new position with that bias already in place.  But everything I saw that day confirmed that conclusion.

Understanding that the vast majority of the readers of this article have a “student leader team” I know I may be swimming up against a white-water wall not worth treading. However, maybe, just maybe, it will cause a few to think about handing out the title “student leader” just because you feel you need to have a student leader team.

I also understand a “counterpoint” can be made for about every argument I can give to not having a student leader team; with that said, I’m very open to those discussions, this is not a hill to die on nor is it something worth splitting those last few youth-pastor hairs over.

Let me state the obvious… there IS such a thing as a STUDENT LEADER.  Even as I write this I look back on my years of pastoring and can identify scores of students who were truly gifted as leaders in my groups.  They were the ones who easily could draw, inspire and move a group of their peers in a godly direction.  And better yet, they did this without the title of Student Leader.

Let me state the not-so-obvious… student leadership is more effective without the title! I believe there are inherent problems with giving the title of student leader and further believe that not giving the title creates a better atmosphere for your group.  Let me quickly give three reasons why I believe a student leader title is dangerous.

  1. “I’ve Arrived”: The Student Leader often feels he or she has arrived. Title is power.  I have seen this too often, when a student is given the title of “leader” and they see that as a power position rather than a service position.  This was the case in the church I described above. The youth group of 150 or so had a student leadership meeting of about 40 students.  Pizza was served, students sat in cliques and argued about what the next event was going to be and when it would take place.  They referred to “the kids” in the group and which event would be the most fun.  In my first three months at this church, the events would typically draw 50% of the student leadership team in attendance with anywhere from five to ten others at the event.
  2. “Burn Out”: The Student Leader often burns out early.  Student government, cheer, club or athletic team captain–it seems that students are bombarded with the challenge to strive for leadership. With the title comes expectation to perform.  “As a leaders you’re expected to do this, that and the other.”  I am not saying that we should get rid of all titles, but I think we often create performance-based spirituality that can lead to burn out (emotional and spiritual) when we give students titles.  In addition, students who are given such titles in their younger years (freshman/sophomore) are often so burned out by the time they are seniors that not only are they no longer leaders, they are often completely gone from the youth group.
  3. “In The Minors”: The rest of the group often feels like they’re in the minor league of the group (it breeds unhealthy spiritual competition).  When students hear “student leadership” what comes to their minds?  I have asked this question and in the youth ministry sphere, the person who comes to mind for a teen is the student with a guitar and/or a good voice, or the boisterous upfront peer (the one most likely to lead games, be in the skit, or rally her team to a dodgeball victory).  What about the servant leader? The private prayer warrior? The guy who is looking out for the loner who walks through the door or the kid who likes doing all the menial administrative tasks with you leading into youth group night?  These students are just as valuable as the upfront and boisterous, but are often made to feel that they are in the minors compared to the teen who wears the Major League badge of Student Leader.

Instead of Student Leaders, shouldn’t we be affirming students in their areas of gifts and strength?  Student leadership will be raised and judged by the quality of student and his or her giftedness and not in title.  If he is a student leader, you will know because others follow him based on skills or example.  If she is a leader, you’ll know not because of the title, but by her actions.

Jesus didn’t name his disciples as “leaders,” he actually called them to be “followers” (Mark 8:34-35).  Let’s lead by being the best followers of Christ and call others to follow Him (and us) closely and make a sharp turn toward the cross!

Stay tuned (or take heart, for those who do have a SL team), next week I’ll speak to the practical ways you can use students in your ministry while avoiding the possible pitfalls I listed above!

Grace,

Brian

CONTEST: Who Am I?

Brian Aaby 6 Comments

It’s been a long time since I ran a contest.  Here’s the scoop, if you personally know this dude, you can’t guess (cuz I know a few people who have met him).

Here is semi-random shot of this celebrity from the early 2000’s… any guesses on who it is?

If you’re the first to get it right (and have never even met him) then you will win yourself a Youthmark T-shirt (a whopping $8-$10 value)!

Guess away.

Grace,
Brian

Three-For-Thursday & SMS: Hindsight for Personal Care

Brian Aaby 3 Comments

We were graciously gifted an XM Satellite radio subscription a couple years ago, typically I am listening to ESPN radio, the DP show and occasionally “The Message.” That is, unless my kids are in the car.  When they get in the car the request line is open, and the request is always, “Daddy, can we listen to Radio Disney?”

The request is pretty much always granted.

Just the other day while taking my kids on a daddy/kid date, we left our house 6:30 for our picnic.  As the car started and the channel changed to Disney there was a song playing that my kids had obviously heard before, Selena Gomez “A Year Without Rain.” They grooved and moved to the beat and sang out the chorus like I may do an old Mili Vanilli Classic (I’m kidding…I promise!).

We enjoyed our time at the park munching down the pizza (thank you Little Caesars for the $5 date) and playing on the monkey bars, fishy bounce, slides and swings.  Then we were back in the car by 7:20.  Guess what was on Radio Disney?  Yep, Selena Gomez “A Year Without Rain.”

Now I know why my kids know this song.  They hear it three to five times a day even though they only have the radio on for 10 minutes.

What does this have to do with a 3-for-Thursday and/or an SMS Post?

As I have struggled to find time to post this week, I have had a number of conversations with Youth Leaders who have reminded me of some of the repetitive messages I wish I would have heard as often as my kids hear a popular song on Radio Disney.  Repetition etches something into memory.  Today’s “three” create a list of three things I wish I would have heard more often in my ministry yesteryears. Three messages I hope the younger generation of the Youth Leader family can not just memorize but live out.

  1. Have an Outside Mentor. We are called to make disciples, but keep in mind, this means you were “made” and you were made to be discipled to so that you can make disciples.  After becoming a Youth Pastor (or even as volunteer youth leader) it is easy to just pour in to others.  Just a few years ago (after 16 years of Youth Ministry) I finally sought out someone who would intentionally look out for me and mentor me (even at a distance).  I suggest you find someone who is outside your immediate sphere, someone specifically outside of your church and perhaps even out of your ministry circles.  Think about it this way; a person who commutes from the suburbs to downtown for work will turn on the radio to hear from “Chopper Dave” who identifies the traffic patterns, warns of blockage and identifies the best routes.  Why not have a “Chopper Dave” in your life? Seek out a person with whom you can be completely honest and is able to identify patterns and warn of upcoming hazzards.
  2. Take Your Day Off! I remember one summer that I worked something like 58 days straight without a day off.  I just knew that the Senior Pastor would notice the incredible work being done.  I was convinced that the elders would be blown away by my work ethic and give me that much deserved raise.  The reality is, it was a great summer, much was done and kids did grow a lot… but I was the only one celebrating the 58 days straight.  Sr. Pastor didn’t notice.  Elders were completely unaware and my pay check didn’t change at all. What scared me the most was at the end of that streak and the kick-off of our fall programming (and maintaining a crazy fall schedule) I went to the National Youth Workers Convention, took their advice and skipped a seminar or two to intentionally have down time.  I had NO idea how to take down time.  My mind was so accustomed to being busy, always thinking that I literally didn’t know what to do for “down time.”  So, young leader (even if you’re unmarried), take time to yourself.  This call is a lot easier to remember if you listened to the first piece of advice above (mentor).
  3. Stick to Your Primary Position/Job/Calling. This could also be titled “learn to say no.”  If you need to be at the elder meeting, go.  If you must be part of that committee, do it. If it is required for you to lead four different ministry teams, so be it. If you are required to preach once a month, then you better do it.  However, too often, I see Youth Pastors (eh-hem, I saw myself) doing these things voluntarily.  Here’s something novel, if your primary calling is to be the Youth Pastor, do that.  Work well with students, staff and parents as your numbers 1-3 priorities (and these priorities should be about equal).  Again, I see YP’s doing what I often did–trying to have a voice at the table, sit on that board or try to be in front of the people as much as possible– this actually leads to not being able to fulfill your primary calling.  Again, sometimes these things are required (but may be something you can negotiate out of your position description).

Each of these three should certainly be better developed, I have a lot to say, but I am going to stick to my own advice here and call it a post. I have much to do and blogging is not my primary calling!  However, I will try to post a few more times about these important matters, because after all, repetition could mean that others will commit it to memory! If you’re interested in talking about any of these in a comment or would like to hear more about any of these specifics, don’t hesitate to contact me!

Grace,
Brian

If You Had To Give $50k to Someone…

Brian Aaby Leave a comment

I love coming up with outlandish “opening questions” for group settings or long car rides.  Discussion starters, if you will.  So, today’s question…

Someone has gifted you $50,000 to give to someone else, who would you give it to and why?

Most of these questions I ask are obviously make-believe scenarios.  However, with the above question, you and I, and all those we recruit have the opportunity to gift teens in America who stand waiting for someone to mentor them.

If I heard the story correctly, last year Pepsi opted out of paying millions upon millions for advertising during the SuperBowl instead opting to create a funding program for non-profits and businesses with creative ideas to “refresh everything.”  Good work Pepsi.

The National Network of Youth Ministries (NNYM) is vying for one of these grants through Pepsi.  Specifically they are looking for funds for their, “MentorYouth” program.  Today, we have 4 Million more youth looking for a mentor than we have mentors.  As Americans our cry is often, “what is happening with the youth today?” Well, perhaps our youth are actually saying, “I wish I had an adult loving and helping me today?”

I realize that I am probably preaching to the choir, in that if you’re reading this post, you most likely already do care deeply about teens.  I’m asking you to care a little bit more and little bit differently over the next 10-11 days.

$50,000 of FREE money, you can help give it away!

Each day you can vote three times for the MentorYouth idea.

Vote Online: Click Here (and for you to copy/paste the url if forwarding this: http://www.refresheverything.com/find-mentors)

Vote by Text:  102430 to Pepsi (73774)

Vote by Facebook: Click Here (and for you to copy/paste:  http://apps.facebook.com/pepsirefresh/idea/set?auth_token=c45e864e6f94e0d2d7cd180ea214734b)

Please note that with the online option you’ll click “vote for this idea” and then it’ll take you to a sign-in page (with word verification) and then back to the “vote for this idea” page.  Make sure you actually click “vote” because the first time ONLY took you to the sign in page, it did not register a vote (you’ll actually get a confirmation on the page and your remaining votes number will change).

HERE IS THE REAL CHALLENGE!!!

With only 11 days remaining (from the time I wrote this), it is ESSENTIAL that you’re not the only one voting.  Here are some idea I’d like to give you to get this MentorYouth idea up into the top 10 (currently ranked 168, top 10 ideas get the funds).

  1. Get your youth group to text in a vote EACH day. Text your entire group each day for the next 11 days.  Say something like, “text 102430 to 73774 to help get 50k to teen mentors” (an initial text/email/fb message will be helpful to explain the idea).
  2. Get your Facebook friends to vote via Facebook. In your status update you can give the link and an update like, “teens nationwide can use mentors, your vote each day will help get 50k! (insert url link)”
  3. Get you church to go online and vote. Send an email, perhaps copying instructions from this blog post to church members and see if they’ll vote as well.
  4. SYATP Viral Campaign.  Have a student on Wednesday (at SYATP) get everyone at the flagpole (before or after prayer) to get everyone to pull out their phones and text 102430 to 73774.
  5. Teens are the best voters! Get your teens to believe in this cause.  If you can get your students to get the word out, especially through texting and facebook, we may see the rankings shoot up quickly!
  6. Blog: If you’re a blogger, either link to my blog, or create your own post with this information.  Let’s get the word out and see the rankings go up!

This will literally take you 2-3 minutes today and 1-2 minutes each day over the next 11 and we could see 50k come through!

Last Note: NNYM is a great organization that has been around for 30 years, in no way am I being compensated for this effort.  I simply believe in NNYM and want to help in any way I can.  In an economy like this, funding like this can be HUGE.  I am praying God is glorified in our efforts to raise awareness that teens need mentors, regardless of whether they get the 50k!

Grace,
Brian

P.S. If you do nothing else… will you vote one of these three ways right now, please!