Category Gospel Conversations

Things That Bug Me Most About Youth Ministry

Brian Aaby 11 Comments

I’ve been involved in youth ministry for over 20 years! I absolutely love it, so please don’t let the title of this post be an invitation to a Debbie Downer moment.

IMG_5177God is at work and there is much to rejoice about when it comes to student ministry. The following is simply a list of stuff that has gotten under my skin… the good news, every one of these is fixable! I’m praying that naming these may be the first step towards the solution rather than just naming the problem.

  • Low standards bug me. Check out the dichotomy of messages we send students: We recruit teens to defend our country. We see those naturally gifted/talented in their sport and push them to the limits so that as a teen they can sign multi-million dollar contracts.   We lead them to believe that if they work hard enough, take AP classes and keep their grades up they’ll receive massive scholarships for school. Yet in the church and youth ministry I don’t think we believe students are capable of so much more. We keep the standards low, we entertain them rather than include them in the development. Too often I hear, “they’re so busy with everything else we just want youth group to be a retreat for them.” When it comes to priorities, which one is winning, the areas that students are being pushed in or the refuge and retreat ministry?
  • Celebrating “growth” bugs me. I love when youth groups (or churches) grow! But the growth that should be celebrated is when someone who was not connected (to Christ or to a body of believers) begins to attend and be discipled. When a person comes from a different church or a different youth group our first reaction should be to protect the bride (unity). If your group is growing with already committed believers transferring in understand that another church/group is shrinking. This isn’t to say there aren’t reasons for people to leave, but please take the time to speak to those issues, seek reconciliation in the relationships involved even if it means your “numbers” are growing as rapidly. Equip your teens to seek and to save that which is lost! Sheep stealing is not growth.
  • 1198058_teenagerExpecting teens to do something you aren’t even doing yourself REALLY bugs me. We (youth leaders, parents, pastors) become discouraged when students don’t do what we’ve asked them to do. “Read your Bible.” “Pray about that.” “Invite your unchurched friends.” “Get discipled.” “Be committed.” These are all things that we seem to expect of our teens, but are these things that you’re doing? I interact with a lot of pastors and  youth pastors, many volunteer leaders and scores of parents of teens and I can tell you, the apple does not fall too far from the tree. The very expectations we have for teens are the very things that are NOT prioritized in the lives of adults. Are you pouring over Scriptures? Is prayer a priority? When is the last time you prioritized sharing Christ with your own peers?

On one hand I’m terrified about the future of student ministries, the very things I named can become an uncontrollable snowball that leads to entertainment only, numerically judged, low standard youth ministries. Or, through prayer, a recommitment to relationally driven, biblically based and Spirit-driven responses we could see a generation of teens lead the cause of Christ!

Grace,
Brian

April (No) Foolin’

Brian Aaby Leave a comment
Move: Mission Prep Workbook

Move: Mission Prep Workbook

This is an INCREDIBLE deal we are offering throughout the month of April. It represents a $40 savings for the Strategy or Strategy Pack Plus deals!

For just $59 per person you will receive a complete package to train participants for before, during and after a mission trip!

By ordering for a team (8 or more) you receive for each person:

  • A Mission Prep Workbook (10 studies and 10 applications)
  • A RoadGrip Devotional for the mission trip
  • A HomeBase Guided study for parents back home
  • A Merge Book; 18 studies through a book of the Bible after the mission

3BooksIn addition, youth leaders receive a complete Leaders Guide which covers all the admin and fundraising as well as 10 outlines for teaching the entire youth group through the core Bible section of Acts the mission team is dealing with.

Many will want to take advantage of not just the curriculum but will want to do the Strategy Plus Pack which gets participants to one of our Mission51 Retreats. You get all the curric and the retreat for only $110!

To take advantage of either the $59 or $110 deals, click here.

Grace,
Brian

Mission51 number one, done.

Brian Aaby 1 Comment

IMG_0428This last weekend was spent at Indian Hills Camp in Jamul (near San Diego), California!

The REAL LIFE themed Mission51 Retreat was an absolute win. Though there are several little kinks that need to be worked out for the next event in New England, I consider this retreat the best “first” event of the spring in our five year history.

The big wins from my perspective (not in any particular order):

IMG_0433The Group Interaction/Broken Down Walls- The programming elements of REAL LIFE get the students interacting with folk from other groups far more than any of our previous retreats. Doing just a little investigation on Facebook I can already see many students from different youth groups interacting and following up online.

Clusters- We introduced a new training method to the groups this year. I am absolutely STOKED about these and how well they worked! This put participants in the most realistic opportunity to practice real-life entry points into spiritual conversations.

IMG_0435Double Vision- The guys  (Mason and Micah) were a hoot to be with and did a fantastic job leading in worship but the most telling thing to me was that they were so much more than great musicians and worship leaders- these guys love Jesus and want others to know him! They took leadership in other areas of the retreat and it truly became a SLAMM (Student Led, Adult Mentored Ministry) setting.

I’m looking forward to five other retreats with DV, (click on that and “like” them) the mentoring side of this is such a fun side of the ministry. I literally watched these guys grow in confidence and grasp the different concepts and opportunities we were giving them. The great thing, God has been at work in and through these boys for a long time. Matt, their dad/manager/agent/mentor was along for the trip as well!

IMG_0439In addition to our time at the camp, I was able to preach at one of the participating churches (Pine Valley Community Church) on Sunday after the M51 Retreat. I love this church and have a great history with them. They invited Double Vision to lead worship as well!

I believe God is going to use these retreats to really make a difference in the lives of teens and adults throughout the country. Your prayers are needed and much appreciated!

IMG_0440And of course there was one other huge win (that literally almost made me miss my flight because of how crowded it was, the delay it caused and the traffic we then encountered): IN-N-OUT Burger!

Mission51 number one, done!

Grace,
Brian

Students Aren’t The Only Ones Asking…

Brian Aaby Leave a comment

Our small group (full of us “older peeps”) had a great conversation last night about the days following the crucifixion.

Questions arose…

  • “If you were one of the disciples, what would you have done after he was killed and buried?”
  • “Would you have believed it when someone said ‘He’s alive?”
  • “What would it be like when you really did see him alive?”

Then the doozy of all questions became the topic of conversation for the rest of our time…

  • “After seeing Jesus alive, who would you tell and how would you tell them about Jesus?”

Our questions has less to do with back then and more about today. Who are we telling about the resurrected Savior of our sins?

I love that the small group with folk in their late 20’s through people in their 50’s is asking the same question teens are asking. As I gear up to train students this spring through Youthmark’s Mission51 Retreats I was pleased to see that my friends at Dare 2 Share just posted a video in which a gal coming off of weekend retreat was essentially asking the question “how can I talk about Jesus after I’ve been to camp?”  You can see the question and read my answer at the D2S blog here. Here is the quick (45 seconds or so) video.

I hope you’re thinking through real-life spiritual conversations just like Joy is. I hope you’re asking the question “whom shall I share with?” and “how shall I share?”

Grace,
Brian

Not too Late!

Brian Aaby Leave a comment

Though we’re nearing the middle of March this weekend very much has a “mission” feel to it.

P1030532If you’re at a church still wondering what you want to do this summer, please don’t hesitate to contact me! I’d love to get you going down the right path so that you and your teens can still get involved with something HIGHLY significant this spring and summer! The cool thing, there are mission opportunities for under $200 to as much as you want with ALL of the training, fundraising and even a retreat involved!

Here’s why I feel this weekend has a mission feel…

1. I am speaking at a fundraising banquet for Youthmark’s premier partner Youth Missions International!

2. My friends at Dare 2 Share just posted a video interview I did with another Youthmark partner, Verge ministries. Check out that couple minute video below (and the post here).

photo3. My own church, Faith, is running a student conference for the ConvergeNW network. Many of these students are currently training for their upcoming Mexico trip through Move: Mission Prep Workbook!

Hope you’re thinking about a mission, but not just a mission trip, prepare for Mission51, the 51 weeks beyond a mission trip! We’re called to be missionaries here, there and anywhere!

Grace,
Brian

 

 

Finishing the Race

Brian Aaby Leave a comment

Over the last couple years I’ve had the opportunity to partner with Scottsdale Christian Academy in the Phoenix area. The SCA High School shuts down “regular” classes for the week to engage in missions all over the place.

This just happens to be the week that the 14 teams are out!

I’d invite you to take a look at the various places they are serving and perhaps click on one or two that interest you and read a bit about what they’ve done and experienced. It is VERY evident that God is at work and more prayer is needed!

Hope you’re encouraged to read what God is doing and we solicit your prayers as these teams finish the race!

Grace,
Brian

 

Don’t Miss This!

Brian Aaby Leave a comment

I had the opportunity in Iowa this week to talk with a number of teens who were pretty excited about Jesus, pumped about some potential changes coming to their youth group and TERRIFIED about anyone ever asking them about their faith.

This should not be.

Unfortunately this is pretty common, not just among teens, but all Christians.

I am pretty passionate about this area and I simply want to see those who know Jesus equipped to have REAL LIFE conversations about him with those who do not yet know Jesus. I understand those fears, but I’ve also seen many people get past that and actually, like me, get to the point where we’re craving those asks!

Please consider joining us though a Youthmark Mission51 Retreat. Check out the 90 second video explaining this year’s REAL LIFE theme.

This is the link to all the retreats! Can’t wait to get real!

Grace,
Brian

Are you Focused?

Brian Aaby Leave a comment

IMG_5101This last weekend I was privileged to partner with two of my good friends in ministry. Rob Townshend and I tag-teamed a Jesus Focused Youth Ministry (JFYM) Forum in Rutland, VT! We “partnered” in a sense with another great friends of ours, Barry St. Clair (though Barry was hanging out in Georgia)! Barry was supposed to be in Connecticut leading another JFYM forum simultaneously… that got a little disrupted!

By now, we have ALL heard about the NE Storm! It was quite the doozy, but fortunately for me, I was smack-dab in the center of the donut hole that didn’t get hit hard. In Rutland we had about 6-8 inches of snow, whereas 15 miles in any direction received anywhere from 1 to 3 feet of snow! AMAZING!

IMG_5118Storms disrupt in many ways, don’t they? There were 63 people from a couple different states and several different cities/counties that were signed up with their leadership teams from a variety of churches. Well, given that the storm hit on Friday and Saturday we were blown away that 36 people were able to make it to the all-day Saturday event!

IMG_5114Of course storms are not always physical. The very nature of this JFYM Forum is to call those in ministry back to a calling that is storm-resistant (I can’t say storm-proof, because I believe we are supposed to be effected by the storms of life). The JFYM Forums focus on 6 main areas of our ministry life, they look at ministry from an inside out approach. The six core principles we facilitated wonderful discussions on:

  1. Growing deep with Jesus
  2. Passionate prayer
  3. Building leaders
  4. Discipling those in our care
  5. Knowing, growing and reaching our culture
  6. Creating opportunities to reach the lost

IMG_5093I thoroughly loved the unity in the room from the 5 different churches and people groups represented. There were a few high school students and several approaching their 70’s. We had some who would consider themselves ultra-conservatives and others who called themselves charismatics! But all of us agreed on the one name that brought us together and the one focus we wanted to have as we scattered: Jesus!

IMG_5177Are you Jesus focused in your ministry? Start with praying for the desire for personal growth, let that extend in and through every aspect of your personal and ministry life! It will lead to ministry fruit if you take an inside out approach!

Grace,
Brian

 

An Open Letter to Senior Pastors

Brian Aaby 4 Comments

NOTE: The below letter is not specific to any one pastor or a specific situation, rather, it stems from years of being a youth and associate pastor, a lay person in the church and now an elder. 

Senior Pastors,

I admire you. You have chosen and been called to such a challenging position. Thank you. Though Hallmark likely created it, Pastor Appreciation Month is not often recognized the way that it should be and you’re not appreciated nearly enough.

714639_16139136You pour many hours into the Scriptures preparing your weekly messages but because you seek to meet the needs of your flock your study time is often cut short. You’re called upon to counsel, you’re asked to perform weddings and you’re expected to attend way too many fellowship lunches. You need to be at too many meetings and the one that you miss will NOT go unnoticed. I don’t envy your position, but I’m thankful you’re in it.

I hope you sense the sincerity of my above words. 99% of the Sr./Lead Pastors I have dealt with in my roles fit the above descriptions and I believe you need to hear more words of encouragement because your job is extremely difficult. I have a different form of encouragement for you as well… an encouragement to consider doing a few things I believe will help you and the people you care for. These suggestions may seem elementary, but please examine your leadership style and ask yourself and/or others if these things are true of you.

Collaborate: Your leadership is needed, but ownership in the values and convictions for  the church will rarely come from your decree, rather by the discoveries of your leadership team (staff, elders, lay volunteers, etc.). Don’t tell them the direction, collaborate on the values and then lead them in the collective vision.

Develop: Steward your staff and your lay leadership well. The Rich Young Ruler walked away sad because he could not give away his riches to others in need. I believe a number of pastors would walk away sad if Jesus asked you to give away some of your gifted people (staff/leaders). Take the time (and allow your other pastors to take the time) to develop others under you with full knowledge that God may call them to be pastors, leaders and influencers to others elsewhere.

643259_40588454Get Unchurched: You spend 99% of your time with people who are or who think they are Christians. Many under your care have no idea how to bring Jesus into an everyday conversation. It won’t matter what you tell your people to say until they know that you’re being intentional about it too! I challenge you to fall in love with the lost, not just fall in love with the idea of the lost!

Again, I’m thankful for you and believe in you. My simple hope is that you’ll believe in us (your staff, your leaders and your congregants) a little more. Believe that we have good ideas and let us give them. Believe that we can be developed and give us the chance to mess up a bit and then catch us as we stumble. And last, believe in us enough to do life with us. Join us and set the example when it comes to loving and spending time with people who don’t yet know Jesus!

Grace,

Brian