Category Student Ministry Stuff (SMS)

Love Freebies!

Brian Aaby Leave a comment

Every now and then we just need a spark, an idea to get our creative juices flowing. I find this to be true especially when it comes to outreach opportunities for our students. So, today I give you free spark…

If you're fortunate, your host home will bless you with Steak!

If you’re fortunate, your host home will bless you with Steak!

One of my favorite events I ever organized as a Youth Pastor was an outing I called “The Dinner Scramble.” I wrote about this event for one of my Dare 2 Share blog posts. It can be found here.

If you’re looking for an opportunity that can bring your church together while motivating your students to reach out relationally to their unchurched peers then this is an easy even to try! Read it, plan it, tweak it and see what happens!

Grace,
Brian

 

Don’t Miss This!

Brian Aaby Leave a comment

I had the opportunity in Iowa this week to talk with a number of teens who were pretty excited about Jesus, pumped about some potential changes coming to their youth group and TERRIFIED about anyone ever asking them about their faith.

This should not be.

Unfortunately this is pretty common, not just among teens, but all Christians.

I am pretty passionate about this area and I simply want to see those who know Jesus equipped to have REAL LIFE conversations about him with those who do not yet know Jesus. I understand those fears, but I’ve also seen many people get past that and actually, like me, get to the point where we’re craving those asks!

Please consider joining us though a Youthmark Mission51 Retreat. Check out the 90 second video explaining this year’s REAL LIFE theme.

This is the link to all the retreats! Can’t wait to get real!

Grace,
Brian

Youth Leader: Four To Do’s For Today

Brian Aaby Leave a comment

Over the last few weeks I’ve been in some circles where I’ve been able to solicit some “student ministry feedback” from pastors, parents, lay leaders and students. Throwing out the comments that were just mean (and likely the issues ran far deeper than the presenting problem), here are three tame ones that I believe youth leaders (specifically those serving in the lead student ministry role) need to hear.

  • Our Youth Pastor’s talks aren’t good–they’re always about deep theology stuff and never about the real stuff us teens need to hear.
  • 1226123_piano_hands_3My daughter decided long ago that youth group wasn’t for her, the leaders show up at sporting events for other kids, but have never once come to one of her piano recitals or even expressed interest in the stuff she’s passionate about.
  • Greg (name changed) is a good guy, but I can’t remember a time he ever asked us, his volunteers, for any ideas or input. I don’t want to just be a chaperone.

If you’re a youth pastor/director, I believe all three of the above issues come back to one thing: relationship.

Those under our care want to be known.

I know it is impossible to know everyone well. I know you have ALL of the other things in your life you are trying to balance and do, but don’t let your natural desire to defend get in the way of hearing this simple point. Sheep are looking for their shepherd. They know your voice and want to be individually known.

This is not a guilt trip, and like I challenged ANY and ALL who issued their “feedback” to be part of the solution, I want to be part of the solution as well. I give all of us in the youth ministry field a “to do today” challenge that I believe will help you in your relationships.

  • Tweet (or Facebook): Send a shout-out for all to hear/read about one of your students. (i.e. “was stoked to see @MirandaRocks at youth group last night, her smile always encourages me!”)
  • Text: Shoot a group text message out to all your youth leaders praising them and asking for tangible youth ministry input. (i.e. “So thankful for our team. Quick question, shoot me a ministry high & and/or a ministry low for you over the last month”)
  • 748351_aged_french_rotary_telephone_setTelephone: Take 5-10 minutes to call a parent you haven’t connected with in awhile and simply ask how you can pray for the family.
  • Tell: Share a story in your next talk that is about a student or volunteer team member. The cool thing, this may motivate you to get out and see a recital, play or sporting event!

In all four of these “T’s” you’re simply letting your group and individuals in your group that you want to know, love and listen to them!

Grace,
Brian

Social Media Reality Check- Are You Consumed?

Brian Aaby 4 Comments

1280072_keyboardThe month started with 34 items on the “to do” list. Each task varied in size & time needed to complete. Slightly overwhelmed, I took a deep breath and dove in… a few minutes later temptation crept in…

… “hey man, quick question” a ministry friend of mine, Brian Ford, was Instant Messaging me through Facebook. “What would you say about your Facebook use? You don’t really use it, you use it a lot, you tend to think everyone is going away from it… something else?”

Facebooking with Brian Ford was not one of the 34 listed items on the to do list. But somehow it became priority #1. If it weren’t Brian on Facebook it could easily be an alert on TweetDeck or an iChat notification. I do NOT consider myself nor have I been diagnosed ADD, however I am discovering how easily the notifications distract and consume.

I was honest with Mr. Ford and told him that I likely am on it too much. We ended up talking about this off and on the next few days and today we both have gone live with blog posts (his is here). Brian spends some time talking about some of the struggles it has caused in his heart, mind and relationships. My post tackles the moderation issue.

How Can I Stay Social & Networked But Not Consumed?

1030887_tweet_tweet___I enjoy Twitter, Skype, iChat, and Facebook and I easily justify the need to stay connected on them. Much of my livelihood has to do with staying connected, available and aware of what’s going on in the ministry world and with the ministers in that world. But the reality is, those I need to stay the most connected with have access to me via text, email or a call. I need to remind myself if I am needed, they can find me.

I do not want Social Media to become a hindrance to my family, faith and/or ability to get work done. So, I am experimenting with something I’m calling First 5, Last 5.

What is First/Last 5?

I am going to challenge myself for a season (a few weeks) to take the first 5 and/or last 5 minutes before or after major breaking times during my day to engage in social media. These natural breaks include breakfast, lunch, end of regular work day and before bed. Other than those times the apps will be off and the sites off my desktop.

I’m not going to be legalistic, but my general guide will be:

  • First five minutes as I begin my workday
  • Last five before lunch
  • First five after lunch
  • Last five at end of workday

My goal at home is to be to keep them off until the kids are in bed and Elisabeth and I are both at the point where we feel the freedom to relax (TV, web, Netflix, etc.)

I have found that I can too easily get sucked into my newsfeed and too quickly link to a blog, news site or become consumed thinking about a witty response to a persons tweet. Therefore, in order to protect my family, my ministry and my workload I’m going to give this First/Last 5 a whirl! Any other takers?

Grace,
Brian

Are you Focused?

Brian Aaby Leave a comment

IMG_5101This last weekend I was privileged to partner with two of my good friends in ministry. Rob Townshend and I tag-teamed a Jesus Focused Youth Ministry (JFYM) Forum in Rutland, VT! We “partnered” in a sense with another great friends of ours, Barry St. Clair (though Barry was hanging out in Georgia)! Barry was supposed to be in Connecticut leading another JFYM forum simultaneously… that got a little disrupted!

By now, we have ALL heard about the NE Storm! It was quite the doozy, but fortunately for me, I was smack-dab in the center of the donut hole that didn’t get hit hard. In Rutland we had about 6-8 inches of snow, whereas 15 miles in any direction received anywhere from 1 to 3 feet of snow! AMAZING!

IMG_5118Storms disrupt in many ways, don’t they? There were 63 people from a couple different states and several different cities/counties that were signed up with their leadership teams from a variety of churches. Well, given that the storm hit on Friday and Saturday we were blown away that 36 people were able to make it to the all-day Saturday event!

IMG_5114Of course storms are not always physical. The very nature of this JFYM Forum is to call those in ministry back to a calling that is storm-resistant (I can’t say storm-proof, because I believe we are supposed to be effected by the storms of life). The JFYM Forums focus on 6 main areas of our ministry life, they look at ministry from an inside out approach. The six core principles we facilitated wonderful discussions on:

  1. Growing deep with Jesus
  2. Passionate prayer
  3. Building leaders
  4. Discipling those in our care
  5. Knowing, growing and reaching our culture
  6. Creating opportunities to reach the lost

IMG_5093I thoroughly loved the unity in the room from the 5 different churches and people groups represented. There were a few high school students and several approaching their 70’s. We had some who would consider themselves ultra-conservatives and others who called themselves charismatics! But all of us agreed on the one name that brought us together and the one focus we wanted to have as we scattered: Jesus!

IMG_5177Are you Jesus focused in your ministry? Start with praying for the desire for personal growth, let that extend in and through every aspect of your personal and ministry life! It will lead to ministry fruit if you take an inside out approach!

Grace,
Brian

 

That’s Tweetable!

Brian Aaby 2 Comments

TYM_ICONToday is a big day, I finally launched my first MailChimp campaign. It was a few weeks (well months) in the making as I put together a strategy that met a few essential criteria.

  1. Give something and possibly get something (give insights, wisdom, experience and inspiration and in return we may see readers take advantage of resources that Youthmark or our partners offer, but do so at a rate they can’t get anywhere else)!
  2. Contribute to a greater cause (I believe student ministry is three pronged- student, staff and leaders, my hope is that all the posts contribute to that three pronged focus and then see the fruit of unity in Christ can bring).
  3. Less is more (though I won’t limit myself to 140 words or less on brianaaby.com, all posts in the TweetableYM brand will be concise, 140 words or less, proving that most of the time, less is more)!

We launched the TweetableYM (tweetable youth ministry) brand today. The TweetableYM branding consists of:

Playing with the 140 character theme from Twitter, we are producing a resource (blog/newsletter) where all of the posts will be 140 words or less! Then connected to the featured (hash-tagged) post we’ll give links to additional writings and resources on that subject.  In addition we will (most always) have a featured resource with an exclusive discount available ONLY to those subscribed to the newsletter).

Check us out on any/all of the above… be among the first 140 to subscribe, like and/or follow and you’ll be entered to win one of three Youthmark hoodies!

We appreciate you getting the word out, feel free to r/t this post, share on Facebook, etc.!

Grace,

Brian

An Open Letter to Senior Pastors

Brian Aaby 4 Comments

NOTE: The below letter is not specific to any one pastor or a specific situation, rather, it stems from years of being a youth and associate pastor, a lay person in the church and now an elder. 

Senior Pastors,

I admire you. You have chosen and been called to such a challenging position. Thank you. Though Hallmark likely created it, Pastor Appreciation Month is not often recognized the way that it should be and you’re not appreciated nearly enough.

714639_16139136You pour many hours into the Scriptures preparing your weekly messages but because you seek to meet the needs of your flock your study time is often cut short. You’re called upon to counsel, you’re asked to perform weddings and you’re expected to attend way too many fellowship lunches. You need to be at too many meetings and the one that you miss will NOT go unnoticed. I don’t envy your position, but I’m thankful you’re in it.

I hope you sense the sincerity of my above words. 99% of the Sr./Lead Pastors I have dealt with in my roles fit the above descriptions and I believe you need to hear more words of encouragement because your job is extremely difficult. I have a different form of encouragement for you as well… an encouragement to consider doing a few things I believe will help you and the people you care for. These suggestions may seem elementary, but please examine your leadership style and ask yourself and/or others if these things are true of you.

Collaborate: Your leadership is needed, but ownership in the values and convictions for  the church will rarely come from your decree, rather by the discoveries of your leadership team (staff, elders, lay volunteers, etc.). Don’t tell them the direction, collaborate on the values and then lead them in the collective vision.

Develop: Steward your staff and your lay leadership well. The Rich Young Ruler walked away sad because he could not give away his riches to others in need. I believe a number of pastors would walk away sad if Jesus asked you to give away some of your gifted people (staff/leaders). Take the time (and allow your other pastors to take the time) to develop others under you with full knowledge that God may call them to be pastors, leaders and influencers to others elsewhere.

643259_40588454Get Unchurched: You spend 99% of your time with people who are or who think they are Christians. Many under your care have no idea how to bring Jesus into an everyday conversation. It won’t matter what you tell your people to say until they know that you’re being intentional about it too! I challenge you to fall in love with the lost, not just fall in love with the idea of the lost!

Again, I’m thankful for you and believe in you. My simple hope is that you’ll believe in us (your staff, your leaders and your congregants) a little more. Believe that we have good ideas and let us give them. Believe that we can be developed and give us the chance to mess up a bit and then catch us as we stumble. And last, believe in us enough to do life with us. Join us and set the example when it comes to loving and spending time with people who don’t yet know Jesus!

Grace,

Brian

Finding the Entry Points into Spiritual Conversations

Brian Aaby Leave a comment

I am not gifted in evangelism.

Though many of the speaking opportunities  I am blessed with deal with equipping teens (or any age) with tips, strategies and tools for sharing our faith, I can honestly say that evangelism is not found at the top of any spiritual gifts inventory test I have ever taken.

Not #1, #2 or even #3 (most of the time it does fall around 4 or 5 though).

Though I am not gifted in it, I do it.

Likewise, though I am not gifted in mercy, I’m called to show it (Matthew 5:7). It would be wrong for me to show myself disobedient to what God has specifically called me to do. And yes, he’s called Christians to share our faith too (2 Tim 4:5). In fact, combining mercy in with evangelism makes for a pretty potent combo!

The cool part, I see God taking someone not-gifted and making me skilled. Like any area of my life, if I want to become better at something, I must learn and try. We become skilled through practice.

933642_talkingDon’t Sweat It– Just Find Your Entry Point!

My goal is to practice Real Life evangelism.

Conversational. Relational. Real.

So many of us just struggle with figuring out the entry point into a conversation. We struggle with moving from the surface to the soul. This is is certainly a risk, but one worth taking. For me, it was a Young Life leader moving the conversation from the weather to whether or not I understood what the camp speaker was talking about.

Take small risks in your conversations and see if it may just be the entry point into a real spiritual conversations.

We put together a poor-mans version of a Nooma-like video a couple years ago called Entry Points. See if this helps equip you or your group with the concept of finding the entry points into the life of a person who does not yet know Jesus!

Grace,
Brian

 

 

Are You Taking The Lead in ALL Areas?

Brian Aaby Leave a comment

Perhaps you read the news last week, Pauline Friedman Phillips, who under the name of Abigail Van Buren, wrote the  “Dear Abby” advice column that was followed by millions of newspaper readers throughout the world, died at the age of 94. Not only does her column continue (her daughter took over years ago), but a spin-off, and a little less known column with a slightly different spelling “Dear Aaby” is beginning to thrive!

Dare 2 Share, a national evangelism training organization has been publishing several of my blogs for the last five or six months and just today went live with another one of the Dear Aaby video blogs.

Mike is a youth leader for Canada, eh?

Mike is a youth leader for Canada, eh?

Mike, a Canadian youth worker recently asked  the question, “what are some cool ways to get my students more into evangelism?”

I’d love for you check out the quick video response here.

The bottom line, we as youth workers, parents and pastors (and yes, even presidents of organizations) better be taking the lead in peer-t0-peer relationally driven sharing!

Like D2S, Youthmark is committed to training all in the area in real-life ways to share about Christ. We have resources for that purpose, but we also have a training experience we’d love to have you a part of. If you’re in (or near) SoCal, NorCal, Colorado, Washington, New England, Oregon or Idaho please consider being a part of our Mission51 Retreat (24 hour blitz-retreat)!

Grace,

Brian

Mission51: Real Life

Brian Aaby Leave a comment

Oh man I’m gettin’ a little giddy. The Mission51 Retreat season is only a couple months away!

In the last two or three years I’ve sensed a renewal in the hearts of many I’ve interacted with. It seems a lot of people are awakening to the spiritual needs of friends and loved ones, but then quickly get frustrated (or defeated) by their inability to share the truth with these loved ones.

It’s as if they’re saying “I know I am a Christian, I love Jesus, I know that I was saved by grace through faith… but I have no idea how to share that with others in a way that is not trite, not cheesy and is non-confrontational.”

I believe at the core, soft-hearted, passionate believers are asking, “how do I share the gospel in real life?”

RealLifeConceptSmallThis is our theme for the 2013 Mission51 Spring Retreat.

With the changes we’ve made and the partnerships we now have the Mission51 Retreat is now completely open to the masses! Any youth group is now open to sign up for the Mission51 Retreat and not just those groups affiliated with a missions trip.  In addition to it being open to all, we’ve got some unique new things happening (see the video below).

We’ve even made it possible for groups to handle the registration online (click here).

Please take a minute and a half now and see the preview video for the Real Life Mission51 Retreat and spread the word to others in and around: Southern California, Northern California, Oregon, Washington, Colorado and the New England States!

Grace,
Brian